A Peck of Gold

One Large Yogalates, Please

Have you heard? Yoga + Pilates = Yogalates.

For some reason, that makes me incredibly hungry. It sounds delicious.

Another Reason to Procreate

Holy crap, could the weather get any more beautiful? Today was just ridiculously wonderful and "autumny".

One of the really nice things about having kids, it's a great excuse to go outside and play. I highly recommend it. We blew bubbles for hours. We played ring-a-round-the-rosy. We hollered for the goats in our neighbors pasture. We identified and avoided dog poo. We toted big sticks around for no apparant reason. We played kickball, in the loosest sense of the term. We climbed a tree.

Now, if I'd attempted to do this without the short people, I would've looked a tad foolish, maybe even creepy. Kids are the key to all things fun for an adult. Chuck.E.Cheese. Legos. Trampolines. Spongebob Squarepants. Etch-a-sketches. Hulahoops. McDonald's Ball Pits. Leaf piles.

Happy Fall, everybody. Grab a kid and go enjoy it.

Enough Already!

I am not happy with the commercials they are showing before movies now. It's rude! I want real previews, not Covergirl advertisements! Grr!!

An Ode to Girl's Night

I sat outside, sipping a Caramel Cafe Latte, waiting for my friend, Rachel. The cool breeze blew serene thoughts into my mind, and the sunset demanded my attention.

We were meeting for coffee before the movie, and I was early. The world was my hostess, and I was drinking up the details. I watched the evening traffic, enjoying the hustle. I listened to the lady at the table nearest to me talking on her cellphone. I watched some teenagers dressed up in formals going into the Olive Garden. I breathed in the aroma of my drink and enjoyed the solitude, enjoyed the wait.

**Snap*Snap**

Who Loves Trivia?

::Hello All! Here's a little trivia to make your day more interesting. (From an email from my Aunt Diana)::

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.

Coca-Cola was originally green.

It is impossible to lick your elbow.

The state with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska

The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% ( now get this...) The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%

The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400

The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.

The youngest pope was 11 years old.

The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.

Those San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.

Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from
history:
Spades - King David,
Hearts - Charlemagne,
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle.

If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle.

If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.

Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th, John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.

"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.

Q. What occurs more often in December than any other month?
A. Conception.

Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace

Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat namerequested?
A. Obsession

Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand

Q. What do bullet-proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All invented by women.

Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey

Q. There are more collect calls on this day than any other day of the year?
A. Father's Day

Q. What trivia fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is the most ironic?
A. He was allergic to carrots.

Q. What is an activity performed by 40% of all people at a party?
A. Snoop in your medicine cabinet.

In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed more firm to sleep on. Hence the phrase "goodnight, sleep tight".

*It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month we know today as the honeymoon.

In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England,
when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them "mind their
own pints and quarts and settle down." It's where we get the phrase "mind
your P's and Q's"

Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the
rim or handle of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used
the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired
by this practice.

In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled "Gentlemen Only
Ladies Forbidden: Thus the word GOLF was entered into the English
language.

~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~

Stop trying to lick your elbow!!!!!

It's true, you did it didnt you? well, you may say that you didnt but it is a
proven fact that at least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their
elbow.

Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.

Hallo-WHAT?

I love Halloween. There, I said it.

Most of the churches I've belonged to have had an "alternative" to the holiday, like Harvestfest or Fallfestival, or Reformation Day. (Reformation Day being a Presbyterian concoction). Now, don't get me wrong, those can be fun. You still get to dress up - usually like Noah's Ark animals but still, it's a costume. You still get the candy - but it's in little party bags all ready to go. You even get to play some games - who doesn't love the team relays? But, there's just something missing in these "alternatives". It's like nutrasweet and sugar. Yeah, nutrasweet is technically a sweetener... but... come on. I want sugar.

I love the feeling you get on Halloween. Giddy and breathless, running up and down the neighborhoods, getting a little chilly, being a little scared. Creeping around the dry ice fogs and fake spider webbing on your neighbors front porch. Jumping and hollaring at the pumpkin-headed scarecrow when it cackles menacingly. Giggling at the little old lady next door that you never expected to dress up like Frankenstein's Bride. Singing the "Ghost of John" song at school with two dozen excited kids. Carving a goofy looking pumpkin and being immensely proud of the snaggle tooth. Knocking on the door and saying those beautiful words, "trick or treat!" in a Princess Leia costume.

It's great to be a kid.

Flex Those Lyrical Muscles

Okay, without cheating, can anyone tell me what show had the following theme music:

Some people stand in darkness
Afraid to step into the light.
Some people need to help somebody
When the edge of surrender is in sight.
Don't you worry, it's going to be all
right.

'Cause I'm always there,
I won't let you out of my sight.
I'll be there--never you fear
I'll be there--forever and always
I'm always here.

Portraits of Cuteness

I may be a tad biased, but these are the cutest kids I've ever seen.

Immersing Myself In LOTR

I know most of you guys have already heard about the plans for the LOTR marathon in December. From what I understand, all three films will be shown back to back on December 16th. This is the lineup: starting at 3 p.m. with"Fellowship", followed by a 7 p.m. screening of "Two Towers" and then an 11 p.m. screening of "Return of the King," which will carry over into Dec. 17 -- the day of its global release.

I am so there. I just hope we get some potty breaks, or it's going to be a long 11 hours.

Coming Clean

Tuesday Confessional:

1. I sing in the car and I don't care who sees me. (Go ahead. Laugh.)
2. I've assigned each of the numbers a personality. (1 is content, 2 is helpful, 3 has a crush on 6, 4 tries to hard, 5 thinks very highly of himself, etc.)
3. At least two days out of the week, I am eating lunch in my pajamas. (perk of a stay-at-home mom)
4. Checking my email is the very first and last thing I do each day. (nerd)
5. I get really sad when the cars beside me on a long drive eventually pull off. (goodbye, old pal, we were really a team)

Okay: Your turn! Fess Up!!

Musings on a trip to Mize

I am a country girl at heart, but I have been tragically transplanted into the city for too long. This was clearly evident on a trip we made to visit my grandfather in Mize, MS this weekend. These are some observations I made:

Notes for the City Mouse visiting the Country
1.) If someone waves at you, make sure they see a reciprocal wave. It's Mississippi, and it's the law. You may be prosecuted.
2.) Every fifty miles or so, you will see an old shack-like house. It will have a vintage coke machine on the porch, and a "we're open" sign in the window. However, it's not been open since 1954, and the coke machine has merely been put out to pasture. Just enjoy the view.
3.) Yes, that flea market is open. You just need to go the house next door, knock and ask for Earl, or Earl's wife, unless it's Monday, in which case you're just out of luck.
4.) Internet maps on backroads? Big no no, cityslicker. Don't even attempt it.
5.) Need gas? See gas? Get gas. Stations are strategically placed exactly one full tank's distance apart. (although, with a bit of fervent prayer, you may be able to ride the fumes for half a mile or so)
6.) Those bright lights out at night are the STARS.... wow!
7.) Don't even try to talk Mr. Local Police Officer out of giving you that ticket. That's his gas money for the week, and next time, you'll know that 25mph means 25, and not 29.
8.) Smell that? Aah... that's what the world REALLY smells like. Bacon. And haybales, I think.
9.) People sit on the porch swing to watch cars go by for a reason. It's fun. Try it.
10.) Don't be surprised if the cows don't moo back. You're probably not doing it right.

Aside from lamenting my newly citified self, I did enjoy this short trip. There's a freedom out in the country that is very rejuvenating, especially with the first hints of fall in the air.

Good trip.
Good times.
Good fun.

Forget the Friday Five

No Friday Five today. I'm too mad. I typed it all once, and inadvertantly ERASED it, after spending entirely too much time working on it anyway. ARGH!!! ARGH!!! Christin, or Jessie, you have to do it today.

On a side note, I really got a kick out of Survivor tonight! I wasn't expecting it to be as entertaining as it was, but I think it will be a good season. I like the big hairy guy. I also like the cheerful, pirate-ish tone to it.

You know what, yay for t.v.

Sure, it can be decrepid, tasteless, liberal trash alot of the time. But occasionally, I just wanna say, shut up about all that and let me watch my Survivor and C.S.I, and Alias.

So there.

Oh, Ricki

Ew. I was channel surfing a moment ago, and caught a bit of the Ricki Lake Show (she's still on?!?) and it was a "make your wish come true" segment. Aw. How philanthropic of Ms. Lake. There were three lovely ladies on, who were competing to make their wish of being a cybermodel on the Playboy website come true.

Way to reach for the stars, girls. Really.

I thought only down and out wannabe actresses "fell" into that lifestyle after being conned into it. I guess that's what you get for watching too many Lifetime movies.

Words in the Wee Hours

I forgot how much I love to write.

Writing is amazing, because the possibilities are immeasurable. You can find a thousand ways to express an idea, and the well never runs dry. "A woman holds something. She clutches, grips, grasps, clings, wields, clenches, embraces, and clasps it." One word, hold, opens the floodgates for a thousand variations. So, you carefully select the word that captures the moment, and then, you must decide what she does with it. "She throws it. She hides it. She keeps it. She curses it. She buries it. She kisses it." Each word leads to a different fork, a different end.

The creation of a story is a powerful thing. When I read a book, I feel like I've released a ghost into the atmosphere, to co-exist with the other specters of hundreds of thousands of books written throughout history. The communing of fictional characters floating high above the earth, brought to life in the minds of all the readers of all the ages.

The idea of liberating one of my own apparitions is astounding. And overwhelming. And intoxicating.

Go Vamps!

I really want to see this movie Underworld that's coming out Friday. Come on, werewolves and vampires? How awesome could that be? I am rooting for the vampires, myself.

Confessional Orthodoxy

I found this article that appears to be a book forward by Jay Rogers, a Reformed Baptist, about the use of Creeds and Confessions. The home link will lead you to a site of books/articles/sermons on the history of the Baptist church and modern Reformed Baptists. With my Baptist roots, I found it very interesting, and thought a few of you guys might as well.

Has anyone read anything by Jay Rogers?

A Helping Hand for the Local Chickens

Here at APOG, I try to support those less fortunate than me when I can.
(by taking pictures of them?)

To Wrenn

Three years ago today, we held our baby girl in our arms for the very first time. Happy Birthday, Sweetheart. Momma loves you!

Wilson Via Josiah

This is directly from Josiah's blog, so I take absolutely no credit at all for bringing up the discussion. (Sorry for the piracy, Josiah) I just wanted to post it here because I have a few readers that may not read his blog regularly, and I thought it was a notable quote from Doug Wilson.

"Web loggers, or bloggers as they are called, set up nifty websites, with cool graphics and interactive gee-whizzery, all of it calculated to... let us read their diaries. This is occasionally interesting when an interesting or challenging person does it - but in many cases the only people who want to read the diaries are those who want to have their own diaries read. This is the same reason why Hollywood actors or Nashville recording artists, when talking about one another, always use the word "genius". What goes around comes around. Asinus asinum fricat. So chalk up another one to technological capacity driving what we do before we understand it."

- Douglas Wilson

This bothers me, and I'll tell you why. For one, it comes from a man that has had many good things to say in the past, yet I find myself consistently turned off from him lately. I don't know him, don't know the details of life up there in Idaho, but it seems that there is a lack of charity in his words. I don't know what this quote was in response to, I'd like to hear the entire discussion. But, even if he's right, (and I don't think he is in this case) it still seems a little unnecessarily insulting.

I don't blog for the celebrity status. So far, nobody's requested my autograph or a head shot. I blog because I enjoy the interraction, the connection, with other people. I like keeping up with friends and family. I like meeting new people. I like discussing things that I would not otherwise discuss during my day as a stay-at-home mom. I like a break from the kids, from the responsibilities of home, I like the creative expression that I have here. And sure, I like to be entertaining and draw readers, too. Is that vanity?

It just seems to me that there are plenty of other issues to be talking about than this. I don't like the assumption that was made, and the way it was said.

Thoughts?

All Things Shannon

::Questions courtesy of Christin. Thanks- these were fun!::

1. What is your favorite thing about being a mom? Those unexpected moments of unsolicited love. Being introduced as "my mommie". Being sung "Happy Birthday" to for weeks after my birthday. Knowing that kissing the boo boo really makes a difference. Being someone's favorite person in the world.

2. What made you decide to get a degree in criminal justice? I love criminals. No, really, I think it was the desire to have control over my environment, to prove to myself that I was more than meets the eye. Okay, really it was a bad break-up.

3. If you had unlimited income, what would you do with the money? Build everyone I know a house. Then, I'd travel until I dropped. I'd come home, and help Patrick open an art gallery, and I'd become a horse breeder.

4. If you had to come up with a personal motto, what would it be? Oh this is hard. How about: Live your life with a soundtrack. That sounds so corny.

5. How did you and Patrick meet and what is your favorite personality trait of his? My college room-mate noticed a cute guy in the cafeteria. She asked me for some good pick-up lines, and being the player that I was, I rattled off a few. She became friends with him, and I met him later, at a dance club at a church function. My favorite thing about Patrick? His easy going sense of humor. And his smile.

****
::If you would like to participate too, here are your instructions:
1. Leave me a comment saying “interview me.”
2. I will respond by asking you five questions (not the same as you see here).
3. You will update your blog/site with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

And the cycle continues, on and on and on...
I'll warn you now: it's easier said than done.::

Snælaug the Marauding Viking

I seem to be addicted to quizzes now. HELP! This one was kind of fun, though. I thought I needed to be a bit more surly. Growl.

I am:
Snælaug Quickjaw

(Well, actually, that wouldn't really be your name -- since you're female, your name would be something like "Snælaug Björnsdottir". But this is the twenty-first century, and you want to be known for who you are, not for who your father was, right? Right.)

Your Viking Personality: You're a fearsome Viking, but you aren't completely uncivilized. The other Vikings make fun of you for that. You are strong and tireless, frequently shouldering burdens that would tire lesser women. You might be able to hold your own on the battlefield, but you're no "berserker".

A long sea voyage aboard a Viking longboat would be difficult for you, but you might be able to manage it. Other Vikings would consider you "one of the guys" if you were a guy. (But even though you're a woman, they still think you're all right.)

You have a fairly pragmatic attitude towards life, and tend not to expend effort in areas where it would be wasted. Due to your gregariousness, you don't strike fear into the hearts of your victims. Try to be a little more surly in the future.

I'll post something a little more academic later, after some coffee. Oh wait, right, I'm supposed to be surly. Okay: Hey, shut up! I'll post something smart when I'm good and ready! You're not the boss of me! Yeah, that's right - TREMBLE BEFORE MY SURLINESS, YOU WEAKLING!

Ooh, that felt pretty good.

A Man Named Sue

Sad to hear that the "Man in Black", Johnny Cash, has passed away at 71. He had a voice like the devil and I'll miss him.

Back by Popular Demand

The people have spoken and they want more, so here is today's Friday Five (more commonly known as "I can't think a single interesting topic to write about, so I'm taking the easy way out, and you can't stop me, so there!")

1. Is the name you have now the same name that's on your birth certificate? If not, what's changed? No, I got married, and since Patrick wouldn't concede to taking my last name, I had to take his. Curse that patriarchal society!

2. If you could change your name (first, middle and/or last), what would it be? What a weird thought. Not to offend my parents, who named me, or my husband, who gave me his last name, but I'd change the WHOLE DANG THING. No, I'm kidding. I like my name. It would've been cool if I'd had hippie parents who gave me a nature name, like "Sycamore" or "River", but c'est la vie. Actually, I knew a girl named River in highschool, and she was, hmm. interesting. Her parents WERE hippies, and she would only bathe in natural bodies of waters. So, she stank most of the time. I guess that happens if the nearest natural water source is the Muddy Mississippi.

3. Why were you named what you were? (Is there a story behind it? Who specifically was responsible for naming you?) My mom heard it and liked it, though she didn't like the girl she knew who had the name. I kinda wish she hadn't told me that part. Oh well. I inherited my middle name from an aunt and uncle. Slightly used, but in good condition.

4. Are there any names you really hate or love? What are they and why? I really dislike Yuppie names, or as Aaron would say, chuddy names, mostly because they lack imagination. I like names that mean something, have significance, or history to them.

5. Is the analysis of your name at kabalarians.com accurate? How or how isn't it? It's pretty durn close. I don't know how they determined this stuff, I just hope there was no graveyard dirt and the death of a chicken involved. This is what they had to say:

The name of Shannon creates a very quiet, practical nature and a clever and inventive mind. Being analytical and naturally studious, you are interested in a factual understanding of the mysteries of life. Your methodical nature requires that you like to finish what you start without interruptions and also to have everything in its place and properly organized. An ability to concentrate could take you into computer programming or accountancy or any work requiring concentration and attention to detail. You have, also, a flair for creative expression with your hands. You take life seriously and can be easily and deeply hurt and go into moods which can be quite extreme at times, causing much turmoil and unhappiness. Finding it difficult to join in conversation with those with whom you are not well-acquainted, you could feel quite alone and uncommunicative with new acquaintances or in a large crowd. As a result, you could be accused of being unfriendly. You desire so much to be understood, but your name has limited your verbal expression to such an extent that it is very difficult for you to divulge your innermost thoughts even to those closest to you. One of your greatest salvations is being out in nature, for it is there that you find the peace and serenity you so much desire.

Your turn!

I Put My Boots On, Cause It's My Birthday

In honor of myself, I am wishing myself the best of birthdays. I am baking myself a cake. I am eating said cake. I am shopping for my birthday present, and giving it to myself with a bow on it. I am insisting to myself that I take it easy and do only what I want to all day long. Happy Birthday, Shannon. You are the hippest, funniest, prettiest 28 year old Shannon you can be. Good job.

In celebration, I took another quiz. (Can this one top the Collosal Death Robot Quiz?? No, but it seems appropriate to the occasion!) Sadly, I am not surprised by the results.

My inner child is ten years old!

The adult world is pretty irrelevant to me. Whether
I'm off on my bicycle (or pony) exploring, lost
in a good book, or giggling with my best
friend, I live in a world apart, one full of
adventure and wonder and other stuff adults
don't understand.


How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla

Why Didn't I Think of This?

Oh, yes. What a great idea!

Sweepstakes Are Run By the Devil

Let's talk about what really matters to you, the readers here at APOC. Candy sweepstakes. They have really gone down hill these days. I don't know about you, but the possibility of winning something greatly affects my candy selection. If there's a KitKat with the chance of winning a car, versus a Snickers with no prize at all, well, I'm going for the KitKat.

The trouble nowadays, is the internet. Instead of a "You're a Winner!" notification, you get a sixteen digit code. You then have to log on to the net, enter the code, then watch Nascar or some other stupid thing, and if they announce your code, or your car wins, then you get ta ta ta dum: a free coke.

Wow.

They know that nobody will go through the trouble of doing all that stuff, so they don't have to actually give out prizes. Damn those corporate devils. Evil geniuses.

Sometimes the internet sucks.

Memoirs of a Zoogle

About once a year, I pull out my box of mementos (which once bore the name, "My Happiness Box", until I became older and wiser and more easily embarassed) and rummage through old letters, photos, journals, and various knick knacks. For a few brief moments, I relive my youth, with all it's glorious nerdiness. I think that's a healthy reminder, since I am so abundantly cool now. I have to keep myself grounded, you know.

There is a Valentine from my mom- it's called a Zoogle card. I must've been about eight or nine when I got it. (Bad picture of it here.) If you can't tell, it has a plastic bubble on the front, and inside the bubble is a once comical felt stick-on guy in a tuxedo holding a bouquet of flowers. You tear open the bubble, and then you've got this sticker character to put somewhere. These were all the rage in 3rd grade. I was so proud of mine. I couldn't decide where to display this treasure, this beacon of coolness. So, I bided my time. I knew, the right place would reveal itself to me, if I was only patient. I kept my eyes open, constantly seeking the place of honor for my Zoogle. Until apparantly --pause-- I just forgot about it. Just like that.

Now, he sits, languishing in a beat up cardboard box, the bubble cracked, and yellowed. The bouquet, though not wilted, is faded. He's still smiling, but it's kind of wistful now. His glory days are gone. Still in his tux, he's all dressed up, but has nowhere to go.

But, I think he's still got some "sticky" left in him. I feel a rush of liberty, and want to set him free. Free to be cool. Free to see the light of day after twenty years in a cramped box with my first pair of glasses and a gaggle of bad poetry. So, I'm again looking- for that perfect place.

Here? No. There? No, that won't do either.

Crap.

I guess it's back to the Happiness Box, Little Fella. Better luck next time.

Identify This Obscure Movie

This is not exactly blogging material, but I thought I'd make the most of a captive audience! Ha!

There is a movie that I watched as a kid (early/mid 80's) that NOBODY seems to remember but me. I think it could have been Disney, and it was geared for family watching. Two twin aliens come to earth as babies with really big foreheads. They are telepathic (indicated by large foreheads) and of course, the government wants to experiment on them and seperate them. The movie is basically them trying to escape and reunite.

Does anyone know this movie? It's been bugging me for about fifteen years now.

Help!

If you click on my archives, for some reason my links are embarassingly huge! I don't remember how or where I might've changed them. Before I spend hours trying to figure that out, does anyone with MT experience have some words of wisdom?

Links Gone Wild

There's no better way to kick off the week than with some pointless internet browsing, so let's do this thing. That's right. You know the drill. Angle the computer screen away from the bosses office. Open your "work" on the screen, and be ready to minimize if anyone walks by... you know, just like you do with the solitaire game. Oh yeah, we ALL know that trick. You didn't think you invented that one, did you?

First, a quiz. I am so freaking cool.

Which Colossal Death Robot Are You?
Vast, red and ready to turn into a lorry at the slightest provocation, you are a robot to be reckoned with. Although sickeningly noble, you just can't resist a good interplanetary war, especially when Orson Welles is involved. You have friends who can shoot tapes from their chests. Tapes that turn into panthers. And other friends who are dinosaurs. Dinosaurs who jump out of planes. Will you have my children?

Oh, how deliciously morose... create your own goth poem and languish in morbidity and angst all morning.

HI-YA! My secret ninja name is Setsuko Sawamura -san. Find yours here. Curtain of Death! Winds On The Desert Atomic Punch!

For all of you working in an office today, watch your back, or your picture could end up on this website. (and that would be a shame.)

Find the gargoyles in archictectural structures in NY. (yes, the country girl was gawking at the big Apple!)

Oh, these pit carvings are just SO cool, I really want one!!

The Dialectizer, similar to the Shizzolator I linked to a while back, changes the language of your webpage. Fun! I liked the Cockney version.

How rich are you? Apparently, I'm rolling in it!. Actually, it does put things in perspective. (Via the Presurfer.)

These horses sing prettier than most people I know. This was quite fun! (turn your sound up and give it a sec to load)

Okay. That's enough fluff for one day. You better get back to work or you are gonna get seriously fired. Slacker.

Saturday Night in the E.R.

::Begin Rant::
You know what's not fun? Going to the emergency room on a Saturday night. Eli developed ear infections over the weekend, and I knew I couldn't wait until Monday to get him in, so I braved the e.r. It was, as I expected it to be, hell.

What disturbed me most was the way a few mothers were talking to and treating their children. I understand that kids are at their most trying when they are sick, but they are still humans. I'm far from perfect; I don't claim to be the model mother. But I don't berate or insult my kids as a form of discipline. You are all they have, lady. Don't make them feel like trash. Your words form them, as surely as your womb did. For their sake, remember that!!

Anyway, I just needed to get that off my chest.
::End Rant::

WARNING: Murky Theology Ahead

In my continuing search to define and understand some theological language, we talked about the meaning of the word "apologetics". The response was really great! Since I don't really have a certain direction to follow with this, I am just bringing things up as they come to me. The following verses have me thinking about God's "sovereignty", so I thought that would be a good topic to tackle next. It's a bit weightier than defining apologetics, and it may be absurd to try to discuss this in one post, but bear with me.

"And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose." - Romans 8:28

"Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and unfathomable His ways! For who has known the mind of the Lord, or who became His counselor? Or who has first given to Him that it might be paid back to him again? For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever. Amen." - Romans 11:33-36

"But our God is in the heavens: he hath done whatsoever he hath pleased." Psalms 115:3

"The Rock! His work is perfect, For all His ways are just; A God of faithfulness and without injustice, Righteous and upright is He." - Deuteronomy 32:4

"O Lord, Thou art my God; I will exalt Thee, I will give thanks to Thy name; For Thou hast worked wonders, Plans formed long ago, with perfect faithfulness." - Isaiah 25:1

I have heard God's sovereignty defined as God's will. I know I've used the phrase "God's will for my life" on several occasions, and I realize it can have more than one meaning. Is one meaning more correct than another? Do they work together to define "God's will"? I can think of two distinct ways of explaining God's will.

The first school of thought is, God has a plan for me and desires me to follow it, i.e. obeying His commandments. It is a roadmap He wants me to follow, but one that He knows I will veer from. He continues to do good things, but they are worked despite my own attempts to screw it up. He is making the most of my mistakes, working good despite the times I exert my will over His. He is more reactive in this view, responding to the shortcomings and sins of His willful children.

In the second view, God's will means that everything that happens is His will, despite how we view it, or how we feel about controlling our own destinies. That God's will is happening, and has been happening because He is omnipotent and sovereign, and His will is the fabric of our existence. Even when the perception is that an event is negative, it is in truth, God's plan. A question that accompanies this idea alot is : But how could a caring God will for bad things to happen? For example: A drunk has a car wreck and kills someone. He's repentant and comes to the Lord because of this tragedy. By the first definition of "will of God", he has sinned and God then uses a bad situation to bring him to Christ. By the second, God's plan included this man's sin, included the negative event of a wreck and subsequent death, so that the man would ultimately be brought to God. Does God cause things to happen (which we would characterize as "bad") to fulfill his Will? In Romans 8:28, the word "cause" is used. That's defined today as "something that brings about an effect or a result". Is it applied in the fullest sense of the word?

I am searching for the view with the most accurate reflection of the Sovereignty of God, as discussed in scripture. I'm trying to avoid the discussion of predestination versus free will, though I realize that this topic can quickly lead in that direction. Is it possible to discuss God's sovereignty without bringing those topics into it? I don't know. The more I think about it, the more it seems unlikely to keep them separate. I don't want this to turn into a Reformed versus non-Reformed, verse-swapping frenzy. What I really want to do is look solely at the Bible and determine if God's will applies in a general sense (where every occurance in life is God's will according to His Sovereignty) or in a specific sense (where God has mapped certain paths for us that we stray from.) I will admit, that I am coming more from the standpoint that everything is God's will, and that even our own will is somehow woven into the greater theme of God's will. But I need to know why I believe that, other than saying, oh that's what we Presbyterians believe. I don't even know if all Reformed people will agree with me, so I don't want to make a blanket statement like that.

Please feel free to post your thoughts on the matter! I hope I wasn't too "murky" on this subject- it's difficult to be clear when I'm not sure what I'm asking!

Tracking My Stats!

Latest searchwords that brought people to my website:
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The origin of pants: revealed!

::I called in reinforcements today. Patrick continues the guest blogger series with this little ditty::

The story of the origin of pants is an interesting and yet little known bit of history. The etymology of the word (as well as the clothing article) is something that has often given me pause. I like pants. I can't imagine life without them. But where did they come from? Has man always worn pants?

I believe I have finally answered these questions, and the answer came as a bit of a surprise. Yet it was something that had been staring me in the face. Something I must have been an IDIOT to have missed. In his work Theogony, Hesiod (ca. 700) mentions the clothing traditionally worn by the deities of the pantheon. Not surprisingly, they are hardly distinct from what the mortals of the time were wearing. Later, Thales goes in to much more specific detail, and it is from this author that we make the startling discovery: Pan invented Pants! How obvious can it be?!

It seems the original deity was not so much a half-man, half-goat that we think of today, but rather a bawdy little man who shunned the traditional toga for his own devices. As time went on, he became so associated with his invention that they became a part of his permanent appearance and bear his name even to this day. UNBELIEVABLE? NO! It's true. Just look at the diagram below if you don't believe me.

::Thanks, Patrick!::

WHO ARE ALL YOU PEOPLE?

As a card carrying member of Chattablogs, I have enjoyed exposure to many interesting, funny, and smart people. No, I'm not kissing @$$, I actually do mean it. Let's face it, the Monroe scene is at times, a bit sporadic. Some of you guys will leave me hanging for a month, or weeks, you jerks! So, I was glad to jump aboard chattablogs where I get updates by the minute (literally). I'm totally addicted to the circuit now. My one complaint, and this goes to all the anonymous bloggers out there, is the lack of profiles. Now, I don't have to know everything about you, I just want a little. Just a tad. Just a teeny weeny bio that helps me to remember what differentiates you from the rest of the "random ranters and ravers" of the blogosphere. I promise I won't hunt you down and stalk you. I promise not to call you and hang up. I promise not to steal your identity and go on an international shopping spree. Really, you can trust me.

Anyway, just another suggestion from miss know-it-all.

Insert Clever Title Here

My baby is incredibly interested in knowing what 4 a.m. looks like. It looks the same every morning, little monster. Dark. Go back to bed.

Today marks my first official day of "work". I'm babysitting two little boys (along with my own two kids) a few hours a week. I'm kind of excited to get out of the house! Of course, I'm just going directly to another house, but still. It could get crazy. You never know.

I went to the dentist yesterday, where they proceeded to beat the crap out of my mouth for an hour and half. I treated myself to the nitrous oxide and that made it a little more endurable. The dentist gave me about ten minutes to "relax" before the procedure, with the gas on full blast. I guess he figured if I'm paying for it, I should get my money's worth. By the time he came in, I was thinking, Mister, you are one cool dude. I think I must've said something goofy - I know I was sitting there smiling, because he said, "Good stuff, huh?"

I opened my mouth to reply, and twelve instruments were immedietely jammed in and work began.

I think he tricked me.

Well, I'm off for the morning. Behave.

My Modem Vs. WHAT YOU TALKIN' 'BOUT, WILLIS?

The first couple of times, I thought it was a coincidence, but now I'm sure of it. Everytime I go to CMWillis's website (WHAT YOU TALKIN' 'BOUT, WILLIS?)- which I really want to do because he has a sweet baby I enjoy reading about, I get kicked off! My modem refuses to let me stay connected on his page for more than two minutes! What's up with that? I know my modem is kinda crappy and needs replacing, but isn't that just a little weird that it happens on his page everytime?

Puritans Had Fun (at least when naming their kids)

I love genealogy, for many reasons. At the moment, I'm getting a kick out of the names I run across while researching. I can't claim one of these beauties in my own line, but YOU might be able to! If you have Puritan ancestors, you could have a grandpappy named:

• Through-Much-Tribulation-We- Enter-into-the-Kingdom-of-Heaven
• Stand- Fast-on-High
• Job-Raked-Out-Of-The-Ashes
• Be-of-Good-Comfort
• If-Christ-had- not-died-for- thee-thou-hadst- been-damned
• Search- the-Scriptures
• Be-Courteous
• Sorry-For-Sin
• Fly-Fornication

I guess they usually went by nicknames, but do you think when their mothers got mad at them, they used the full name? "Through-Much-Tribulation-We- Enter-into-the-Kingdom-of-Heaven Smythe, you get in here right now and start on your chores this instant! Why can't you be more like your sister, If-Christ-had- not-died-for- thee-thou-hadst- been-damned?"

I bet those kids ran like hell.

(For more Puritan slogan and virtue names, see Rootsweb and Onomastikan)

CottonWings Comics

Patrick has requested that I cease and desist with the "stripping" jokes. So, without further ado, please see his latest addition to the comic page. (Now wouldn't that have been funnier my way?)

He did say I could encourage you to "cruise the strip" though. Harumph. Also, if you want to leave comments, he's added a guestbook to the home page.