A Peck of Gold

Shannon, You Get Down From There!

One of my absolute favorite reoccuring dreams is that I am flying. If you've not had one of these before, you are definately missing out. I don't know that I put a lot of stock into the meaning and interpretation of dreams, but there is something really unique about flying dreams.

Flying dreams fall under a category of dreams where you become aware that you are dreaming, known as lucid dreaming. Many dreamers have described the ability to fly in their dreams as an exhilarating, joyful, and liberating experience. (Taken from Dream Moods.)

Exhilirating. Definately. I think everyone dreams of flying in a different way. For myself, I have to get a running start, and take a big jump, and I'm up, up, and away. I fly over the town, over fields, and other low lying areas. I never really fly into clouds- I sort of cruise cities and surrounding country. The only rule is that I can not go up at a 90 degree angle , or I "putter" out and the trip is over. It's so disappointing if I accidentally forget that or can't avoid it. It never lasts long enough!

Other people I've talked to have their own styles and rules. I know someone who has to spin around like a helicopter and she begins to lift off the ground. Some people have wings, some people float in bubbles...

I think the coolest thing about flying dreams is that you realize it's a dream, and you have a lot of control over what happens... it's less like a dream and more like reality in that respect. This lucid dreaming is something that you can teach yourself. A trick that I was told a long time ago is to put a mark on your hand, and everytime you look at it during the day, ask yourself, "is this a dream?" Obviously, you know it isn't, but you'll get into the habit of asking that question. Eventually, you will ask yourself this question in a dream, and it will hit you, that yes, this is a dream, and suddenly you're lucid dreaming. Then you can direct the activities in your dream. It's pretty cool! Here's a website that tells you more about lucid dreaming, how to initiate it, and how to maintain it. Give it a try, you won't be disappointed!

By the way, how do you like my little photoshop goodie? What a fun program...

Blog Blurbs

I've decided to include a new section on the sidebar here at APOG. It will be snippets from other blogs with a link back to 'em. Go. Browse. Just be back before 11 or you're in big trouble, Mister.

Another Recruit

One by one, they all leave blogger, and head for chattablogs... now joining the crowd is my sister, at the newly revamped, Swaying Daisies.

Motherhood rears it's head again

Watching Wrenn grow up has taken on a new, decidely more painful perspective lately. I have always appreciated each aspect of my children's development, cherished each moment because I KNOW they grow up so fast. I try to make the most of every second, but I've come to realize, that doesn't help to slow down the process.

Last night, we had Courtney and Lisa over for dinner since they were in our neck of the woods. We had a great time, and enjoyed a rare opportunity to hang out with some of the "old gang" from Monroe on our own turf. Wrenn warmed up after a little while, and quickly dubbed them "my friends", as if they'd come specifically to see her. Lisa, patient gal that she is, let Wrenn play with her hair. Courtney tried, to no avail, to explain the Trinity to her (better luck next time!) Wrenn had a great time, and wanted them to do our nightly Bible Story with her, and possibly sleep over, but I told her we'd just have to save that for another day.

Watching her and seeing how clever and thoughtful she has become sent a sudden pang of sadness through me. This time is so incredibly sweet, and it's passing right through my fingers. I am proud of the little girl she is becoming, but I can't help but want to keep her just as she is now -forever. So trusting and loving and giggly... So in love with everything around her.

I know, I know. It's bittersweet. Right now, though, everything is perfect. I don't want it to change. I guess at the moment I'm feeling more of the bitter, but only because of the overwhelming sweet...

Someone wanna try to cheer me up here? I'm a little ver klempt.

It's Good to Be Queen

You know what I like? Technology that's eager to please. I enjoy those software programs that, if you type a word repeatedly, eventually the program catches on and says, hey, let me do that for you. I type my name "S...H...A.." and the program jumps in "Shannon? Is that what you wanted to say? Please, let me. Sit back, take it easy. No, really, I want to do this for you. Can I rub your feet? Are you thirsty?"

Now that's progress.

Not another quiz...

What? You want a quiz? Well, here you go. See what kind of blogger you are. Stealing a little language from Christin, it appears that I am purty awesome.

You are an enigma wraped in a mystery, you blog
for yourself. You have your own reasons for
doing what you do. We are still glad your here!


What kind of blogger am I?
brought to you by Quizilla

Not what you'd expect

I'll be gone for three days.

Dissing the Disclaimer

I was blog browsing earlier, and came across this "Blogger's Disclaimer". Curious, I clicked on it just in case it was something I needed to have on my own site... (you guys know I like my bells and whistles!) and I was mildly offended after I finished reading it.

First, I think the language is rather hostile and arrogant. I think it separates, or maybe even elevates, the author of a blog from his or readers. I suppose that this could be necessary if you have a large reader audience, for privacy reasons. But, if the writer doesn't want people to contact him, he should leave off email addresses, instant messenger screennames, and personal details.

Another point was that if the author doesn't want you to read his thoughts, then you should stop visiting their site (i.e. if they are too personal, etc.) Bwahahaha - that gave me a good laugh! If you don't want others reading your personal thoughts, then you damn well shouldn't publish them on the internet. Write it down in your own journal, in invisible ink, and lock it up and hide it under your bed. Otherwise, the second you hit "enter", you broadcast those thoughts to your best friends, and your worst enemies. Don't post things that you don't want others to read. Always assume that the person you are writing about will be reading it immedietely. Mind your manners and if something you write is going to get you in trouble or expose you emotionally - maybe your blog is not the place to put it.

The disclaimer also mentions how uncouth it is to directly write the author of a blog for html or design help. Oh please. How superior is that? I have found that the vast majority of people on the net are incredibly friendly and willing to assist! I cannot think of a single instance of someone refusing help or brushing me off in the five years that I've been tinkering around with webpages and design. Now, I know that if I was to write the webmaster of CNN.com, he's obviously not got the time to help me individually. Yes, there are tutorials out there that you can use - but sometimes it takes personal feedback to grasp a certain concept. I know that if someone wrote to me and said, hey your blog looks great, can you give me some tips, I would be flattered, not irritated that my precious time was being wasted. If I really was too busy to adequetely help, I would refer them to a tutorial, but I wouldn't get mad about it.

I will agree with some of the other content of this page- about bandwidth theft, images and text copywriting, stalking, and constructive criticism, and the common sense stuff. All I'm saying is, don't get a big head about your blog. You began where everybody else did and if you start taking yourself too seriously, I'm outta there. I don't need to read another pretentious blog from a stranger who thinks he's better than all his readers.

So there.

Blog Titles 'R' Us

Does anyone need a title for their blog? I've got one and it's great for the Seinfeld fan. "Serenity Now".

I'm just a fountain of good ideas.

Ghosts on My Blog

What's up with my blog, yo? Some crazy stuff is happening. I think I'm haunted. Colors changing, lots of weird things. Patience friends... if it doesn't fix itself soon, we'll have a seance to rid my blog of this poltergeist.

Peanut Butter Fury

We had a strange experience last night. I will try to condense this as much as I can, but it's a rather long story. I mentioned our crazy neighbor a while back, so this is part two to that post.

Let me set the scene. A month ago, I gave "Patsy" a jar of peanut butter - it was supposed to be some home remedy for her sick dog (I didn't ask...). She stopped by on Sat. and I was standing in the doorway talking to her. I never open it all the way, because her dogs will run in, plus I am doing everything I can to limit her visit. Anyway, Wrenn said, "Don't come in." Which was not nice and I got on to her - but she says that to anybody - the mailman, whoever. Everything was still okay, and Patsy went to her apartment, seemingly fine. Okay. Scene is set.

Saturday night, Patrick and I are in the living room and we hear this huge BANG! It scares me to death! Patrick swings the door open, and Patsy is way across the yard with her dogs. Patrick says, "Patsy??", to which she angrily yells back "I didn't want my stinking dogs to bother you (mumbles something else)!" At this point, I look down and see the peanut butter jar. I picked it up and we shut the door, stunned. She had just hurled this at our door as hard as she could!!?? If it had hit the window, it would've surely broken it - it was that hard.

So we're sitting there, thinking, what the heck is happening here?? Either she's mad at us, or she's mad about something else and taking it out on us. It's hard to figure out, because she is truly, actually crazy, and it could be anything...

We are laughing and stunned for about fifteen minutes. Then I think, you know what? No. That is not acceptable. No matter what's wrong, you can't just go around throwing peanut butter at people's doors when you get mad. So I decide to take it back up there and find out exactly what's going on. I walk up the steps, knock on the door, and she opens the door. Right off, I know she must be off her meds, or something, because she is wild eyed, hair flying, and is walking around like a pitbull. I said "Do you want this?? Why did you throw this at my door?" She says "NO, I didn't want to knock on your door because I didn't want my dogs to stink up your house and bother you!" She's waving her arms up and down, and looks like she is about to explode - I'm serious. She looked like a Berserker, and I knew she was about to totally lose it. She keeps mentioned the dogs, and I say, "WHAT are you talking about? What is wrong with you?!"

At this point, her dog comes running out, dragging his leash, and starts to get tangled around me. She is extremely agitated and grabs the dog with both hands, and HEAVES him across the room! I don't mean a little toss - she hurt that poor dog, he's yelping and crying, and I am totally in shock! Then, she barrels off into her room, leaving me standing in the doorway with that stupid jar of peanut butter, and now I'm thinking, oh yeah, she's going to get a baseball bat or something to beat the crap out of me! I'm outta here! I set the jar down, and walk down the stairs(okay, briskly) . Before I can get back in our door, she throws that jar across the yard again. I come inside, and report all this back to Patrick, who is just as shocked and astounded as I am. We are still laughing though, because no sane person would EVER act the way she was - it was nuts. Nobody goes from just fine to insanely furious like that.

About an hour later, she knocks on our door and apologizes. Her explanation was that Wrenn hurt her feelings. I said, "Well, I'm sorry, but she's TWO YEARS OLD. You gotta let stuff like that roll off of you, Patsy." She said she didn't think I liked her because she was picking up signals from me. She also thinks I'm a dog hater. I couldn't really say, "You are irritating and self centered and I don't want to be around you and let your dogs (who DO stink by the way) lick all over me and my kids and if you are picking up signals then you should act like any other person and TAKE THE HINT!". So, what I did say was "Look, I know I am probably distracted when you come by, but I've got a lot going on down here, and you shouldn't get all bent out of shape. And if you ever DO get mad at me, then come down and here and tell me - you can't just throw peanut butter and freak out when you get upset." She said, "Well, why do you hate dogs?" -Sigh- I cannot make this woman believe I am not a dog-hater, no matter what I say.

I know that sounds very cruel of me, and I feel bad for disliking her so much. I consider myself a nice person, I try to be friendly. But she is seriously unbalanced and I can't do more for her than I've done.

I ended it with "Okay Patsy - peace. Let's just let it go."

Anyway, that was such a bizarre event, I just had to blog about it.

Never Ending Renovation

Okay, I'm at it again. I think I've come up with a scheme I really like for this page, so I'll be implementing it over the next few days. Please forgive any craziness you see...

Eye Candy

This just proves you don't have to eat funny mushrooms to enjoy a good hallucination... but it does help. HA! (via the Presurfer, as usual!)

Me Likie the Linkie

I adore misprints in ads, newspapers, or church bulletins. (click their main page for other slipups)

Nothing like legos in the hands of maniacs to make you really contemplate death. (Note: takes a while to load, and may be offensive to some!)

Obsessing over your age? See how old you are down to the very second!!

Do you talk to yourself? Now hear the response online. (Only do this one if you're REALLY bored.)

Have some fun with Madlibs.

Okay, that should keep you busy for a while... feel free to add some links in the comments section if you wanna. I know you're just goofing off all day anyway.

Let's All Go To The Lobby...

Again folks, the Friday Five.

1. If your life were a movie, what would the title be?
"Extreme Measures".

2. What songs would be on the soundtrack?
Lots of techno, cause we'd be dancing a lot, running, sneaking around, scaling walls, setting traps, that kind of thing. Also, we'd be infiltrating really cool places, like Russian Nightclubs and high survellience buildings, so we need exciting music that goes well with black clothes.

3. Would it be a live-action film or animated? Why?
Live action so you get the full impact of the fight scenes and explosions and Matrix-like moments.

4. Casting: who would play you, members of your family, friends, etc?
Mila Jovovich would play me, Harrison Ford would be Patrick, Natalie Portman would play a much older Wrenn, and Jake Lloyd would be Eli. The kids only make cameos though, because it's just too dangerous for them. As a matter of fact, they may be kidnapped during most of the film until we rescue them at the end.

5. Describe the movie preview/trailer.
You come away slightly dizzy and intrigued, possibly confused, and you buy advance tickets and campout in line the night before just for good seats. YOU ARE NOT DISAPPOINTED. You highly anticipate the sequel, and I make millions of dollars.

Small Talk

Sorry, guys. I just haven't been in a blogging mood today... I'll do better tommorow. I did want to say, though, how happy I am here at Chattablogs. I had editing problems at Blogger while I was there, and now something must be up with Blogspot. All the blogs I visit over at blogspot have been loading incredibly slow, if they load at all! Is everybody having this trouble, or is it just me?

Shots and Dinos

There are fewer things in the world I like less than taking my kids to the doctor. Both had to get shots today, and it's so traumatic. Wrenn went first, and she cried but she recovered quickly. Then Eli had to get them, and he was FURIOUS. Wrenn cried harder for Eli than for herself... she hated to see him hurting. There are lots of great things about being a mom, but that just isn't one of them.

However, a new dinosaur coloring book went a long way to putting a smile on Wrenn's face again, so all is well.

Your Momma's a Monkey

No, No, No.

I just caught a scene from the soap opera "Passions". A chimpanzee (who is dressed up as a nurse because she's a Helper Monkey to an old lady) is in love with a man- Luis, and is daydreaming about having his baby... it showed her in the delivery room with Luis holding her hand and telling her to push...

I can't even begin to tell you what's wrong with this soap opera, but the words "insanely stupid" come to mind.

My Vow to You

I promise never to use the following words on this site again:
rant
rave
random thoughts

Apparently, every third blogger in the world uses them to describe their page.

Old School

I caught up with an old, and dear, friend yesterday that I have not spoken to in a few years, and we dished up what we knew of our old buddies. You know, who's gay, who's gone crazy, who still gives that creepy handshake, etc. This got me thinking about our Class Reunion next year. It would be my ten year highschool reunion, if our Class President is out there planning it, ELLEN!! I think if we had one, I would attend, but I would be REALLY nervous about it. I mean, basically the Reunion is an okay-how-did-you-screw-up-or-improve-your-life checkup. Did the cute girls stay that way? Did the smart ones become millionaires? Did the jocks get a beer belly? Did the nerds blossom into hotties? Do I really still care about these people and their opinions of me? Ouch. I think I do.

I don't know if they would measure my life as a success - probably not, by some of their standards, at least back then. I'm not in an exciting career, I'm don't live in a big, beautiful house, I haven't traveled much, blah blah blah.

I am happy, though. I have a wonderful, loving family. I have goals and aspirations. I have a freaking blog. How much better can it get?

I would hope that alot of those people have grown and changed over the years, and come to understand what most of us already knew back then: Looks, money, and social class are not true measuring sticks for success. They are fickle, and don't last forever.

As to those friends who were true friends, well, they are the real reason I would go. But like I said, Ellen's probably too busy running a Fortune 500 company to give little old Vicksburg Highschool another thought. Oh well. The good, yet slightly scary, thing about Vicksburg is that people leave after graduation, usually on the first wagon out , but they always end up going back after a few years. It's inevitable. Can't fight the call of old Warren County.

Okay, everybody join in...

Sometimes you want to go
Where everybody knows your name,
and they're always glad you came.
You wanna be where you can see,
our troubles are all the same
You wanna be where everybody knows
Your name.

Rest of Cheer's surprisingly funny lyrics here.

Bad Google, Bad!

Everyone go to Google, and enter your phone number with dashes (555-555-5555), click enter, and see if your personal information pops up. This warning is courtesy of my Aunt Dianna. If you don't want your name and addy popping up on the internet where any freako can find you, there is a remove button. Mine wasn't there, but I looked up some other numbers I knew, and sure enough, there they were. Scary.

Say... Have you been working out??

Oh.. My.. GOSH.

I am speechless!

Cartoon Homework

Here's your homework for tonight. Read this link, (via the Presurfer) then report back to me. He meant it as a joke, and I did laugh over some of it but it also got me thinking. Some of you have kids, will have kids, want to have kids, or in some cases, just ACT like kids. Regardless, we all make decisions about what t.v. programming we allow in our home. This article is about some of the cartoons kids watch and some possible or imagined occultic meaning behind them. I think some of it is pretty silly, like My Little Pony, but I want your opinions.

Naysayers Beware!

When Patrick and I got engaged, and for a while after our wedding, I recall several people telling us, "Oh, just give it two years, then you'll be wondering why you ever thought to get married!" They would usually laugh sarcastically and nudge the other older married folks in the group and say, "Am I right? Huh? Huh?" Somehow, it made them feel better to cast a shadow on our happiness - to put a fear into our minds that we were helpless to argue against for lack of experience. But, even being told this from others with more married years under their belt than our combined ages, we knew that didn't ring true.

Something created, destined, and ordained by God should never be a thing we bitterly mocked and complained about. Surely marriage didn't have to be a continual descent into a hostile union of two people "stuck" with each. I want to set the record straight for all my newly married friends and family out there: It can be incredible. We've been married six and a half years, and though that's not a lifetime, it's turning into one. I don't want to embarass my husband by going on and on about how great he is, (although he is!) but I do want to let you know that you CAN stay in love with your spouse. Yes, it evolves, it changes. It becomes something different than what you started with, but it's so much better.

So don't listen to those people. They will also tell you, "Appreciate your figure, (or your free time) because after you have kids, it all goes to pot!" Then they tell you what a chore it is to raise children, how they start out cute and turn into hellbent rebellious teenagers... or they tell you just wait till you turn 40 and start losing your youth and beauty... They've got something negative to say about every important change in your life.

BALONEY, I say. Maybe YOUR life was like that, but mine is not. I don't know why people become so jaded and sour, (though I have some theories!) but I urge you to ignore their comments and believe that life is bright, and full of promise and potential. You'll be infinitely happier if you do.

My future's so bright, I gotta wear shades.

Emotional Rollercoaster

Eli in picture one.

And one nanosecond later.

Googlie Wooglie

I am laughing so hard right now. You must go here and see what Google thinks of you. Just enter your first name, and it pulls out sentances from a gazillion webpages that have your name it. My favorite one is "Shannon is going to show us her whisker bisquits" Good lord, what does that mean???

Also:
Shannon is not a murderer,
shannon is a living highland games legend,
shannon is right on the money,
shannon is a retarded cow, and
shannon is three feet six inches tall and pale with rosy red cheeks

(See the rest of mine.)

This reminds me so much of Aaron's post, that I wanna give props to him. Go see his Google Ego Search.

A Side Note: Since it peruses a variety of websites- just ignore it if you see a bad one... hey, I didn't invent the internet, don't blame me. Blame Al Gore, I guess.

Click the extended entry to read other people's names that I thought were funny!

patrick is learning his alphabet and numbers before he goes to kindergarten

josh is secretly a ninja

aaron is joel’s imaginary friend

joey is not available for adoption yet

micah is very mentally and physically delayed (sorry, couldn't resist!!)

courtney is behind bars

christin is captured by the gangsters and abducted in a military airplane

jennifer is threatened by a hungry wild rooster

josiah is a fully jointed modern bear with straight arms and legs

lisa is the voice behind some of the 1980s' most memorable songs

ashley is angry that she’s higher up the ladder than she should be

bart is getting some of his fur back now

okay, I guess I can't do this all day. Boy that was fun though!

Ze Friday Five, Madam...

Okay, today's Friday Five really SUCKED, so I decided to use an old one.

1. Do you like talking on the phone? Why or why not? I do, actually. I'm just sitting around on my butt all day anyway. (lol)

2. Who is the last person you talked to on the phone? My cousin Joey.

3. About how many telephones do you have at home? One, but it's portable so it goes all over, although I refuse to take it into the bathroom for any reason.

4. Have you encountered anyone who has really bad phone manners? What happened? I accidentally called a wrong number two times in a row, and the lady was SO RUDE that she made me cry! (I'm not a cryer!) It was a business, so Patrick called back and spoke to this lady's boss and told him how ugly she was. It was unbelievable and totally unprovoked.

5. Would you rather pick up the phone and call someone or write them an e-mail or a letter? Why or why not? I think I'd rather write - because it's so nice to get mail!!

Okay, so that's the five for today, at least MY five. The others were so depressing, I just couldn't do it.
----------------------
Extra stuff: Here is a link courtesy of Joey about the evil bite of the recluse spider. It's TERRIBLE! Please don't view this on your lunch break. My fervent, frantic, paranoid prayer is that no one I know ever gets bitten by this satanic spider.

And on a totally different end of the spectrum is my sweet aunt Vickie's new blog, Honeysuckle Summer. I promise there are no evil spiders or gross pictures there. Yet, anyway!

The "Blank" of the Week

Quote:
"Time flies when your ass is on fire..." ~ EvilR

Idiot:
This Guy. (from our own LA, too!)

Riddle:
You will find me with four legs, but no hair.
People ride me for hours, but I don't go anywhere.
Without needing to be tugged, jerked or turned on,
I always manage to be ready for work?
What am I?

Link:
Publish a book.

Tip:
Don't run with scissors.

Product:
The Sushi Clock

Smurf:
Brainy.

Lookie Lookie

How do you guys like my splashy pink blog? I am designing a couple to switch out occasionally, depending on my mood. Today I feel sort of retro-cottoncandyish.

I have too much durn time on my hands.

As an aside: If you guys want to let me practice on your blog, I'll be happy to do a little editing for you (colors, images, fonts, whatever). I'm trying to teach myself how to do this, and the more I do, the better.

That Girl Can Punch!

The new Laura Croft movie is coming out, and I'm not ashamed to say I want to see it. I know, I'd probably be the only girl in the theatre - I was for the first one. But, let me tell ya, I dig chicks that can fight. I always have- starting way back with Wonder Woman, and making my way through Zena (pre-lesbo episodes), Buffy, Dark Angel, and currently Sydney Bristow on Alias. (that's an abbreviated list by the way) I don't know what it is about a girl who can take care of herself, but it's very cool in my book.

And no, I'm not a man-hater.. I'm not saying women don't need men, I'm not saying we're stronger, I'm not railing against the patriarchal society, etc. etc. I'm just saying, I'd rather see a girl kick butt than a guy, because it's more compelling, more of a leap than a man versus his own peers.

In that vein, I have taken taekwondo off and on through the years, and am getting ready to pick it back up again. (I usually get to yellow belt, then money or circumstances interrupt me). It's not that I want to beat people up, but it feels very good to know you aren't defenseless. Plus, it's great excercise, it's good discipline, and I look great in a Gi.

Thoughts?

Ranting on Spam

I can't say I like the potted meat, and I definately don't like the spam that fills my inbox every day. I use my hotmail address on the genealogy message boards that I post to - that way, when someone replies (sometimes even years later) they will reach me for sure. However, if I could go back, I would not use my name in the address. I get mail that is generated by random name combinations. Like Shantrisler, shannatrisler, shanontrisler, and they eventually get to my name. So there I am, with the opportunity to consolidate my debt, (possibly with an online casino), increase my masculinity(which is sadly lacking), lose weight (hey, mind your own business!), or possibly help some Nigerian banker out of a jam and make myself a cool 5 million. I probably get 10-15 unsolicited emails a day, and some are NASTY. It makes me ill and it is highly offensive. I have my junk filter on, so at least it goes there, but I still have to check that because I am afraid an email will slip through that I'm supposed to get.

Spam is RUDE RUDE RUDE. Did you know that there are email extractors, called spiders, that peruse websites and glean email addresses for spamming? How low is that? Not to mention that there is a black market for email lists and I'm sure I'm on a few of them. Here's a little trick though, that might help - at least it makes a little trouble for the spammers...

In addition to spam, pop-ups are on my bad list, too. If I have one more message from someone named "Michelle", "Jen", or "Amber" (no offense to the peeps I know with this name) who just want to talk, and get to know someone special like me, I'm going to scream! But most of the pop-up isn't from them, it's from the Stop Pop Up People! It's spam blackmail! They are basically saying, if you buy this service, then we'll stop pop-upping you!

~sigh~ I am capable of handling the spam - I try to ignore it and just discard it immedietely, but what really bothers me is that anyone with an email is a target, even kids. I will be watching very closely when my children are online.

Okay, that's my thought for the day. I hadn't intended to blog about this today, but I opened my mail today and found myself needing to vent! If you want to get it out of your system too, go right ahead! The forum is open!

I Speak Toddler

I bet you didn't know this, but I speak three languages. English (duh). Smattering of Spanish. And Fluent Toddler.

Toddlers are fascinating creatures. I thought about trying to count the number of questions Wrenn asks me in a single day, but I quickly realized that I am not up to the task. Just let me say: It's a lot. And they are not limited to actual, sensical subjects. For example:

"Where'd the chili go?"
"What chili, honey? Lunch? The country? The degree of coldness?"
"No, the tiger... in my room... pleaaaase?"

How does that make sense, I ask you? Well, it doesn't. Granted, 75% of the time, I can follow it, and when others are around, I can translate for them. Toddlers develop language without the mental maturity to apply it correctly all the time. That remaining 25% though... well, your guess is as good as mine.

But, I will admit that it's fun. I never know what she might say, and she actually is pretty clever and inventive. She uses her limited (but growing) language to express a great variety of things. I know it is only a matter of time before she's got this thing down.

I've heard that we spend all this time trying to teach our kids to stand up, walk and talk, then the rest of our lives trying to teach them to sit down, be still, and be quiet. Lol. I relate, oh wise joke makers.

Update: Wrenn just came up to me with a barcode sticker on her forehead, and a stuffed moon toy in her hand and with a silly smile asked "Is this a moon-ster, Momma?" See what I'm talking about? She's a joy, she really is.

Anime Me

See me ready to take names and kick butt, courtesy of Patrick. (It's fun having an artist for a husband)

Mission If You Should Choose to Accept:

Math nerds and/or software programming geniuses:

You must go here and try this, then report to me the secret of HOW THIS WORKS! It guessed correctly EVERY SINGLE TIME I tried it!

I am dumbfounded (indicated by frequent use of caps key!!)

-- this message will self destruct in 5...4..3..2..

KABOOM!!

you really should've ducked or something- you could have been seriously injured

Shan-ism

Have you ever over-described something? It's kind of embarassing. Not that long ago, Amy, Patrick, and I were talking about the color of someone's hair, and I said, "Yeah, it's black as a. . . a. . . raven's feather". They laughed mercilessly at my dramatic description. I don't even know why I said it. It was really more of a brown anyway.

I Heart My Blog

I love this blog. It's everything I always wanted to do with my website but couldn't. I've spent a lot of time reading other's blogs, and figuring out for myself what I want to do, what this blog means to me.

There is an art to blog browsing in itself. It's a process of weeding out the bad, and gleaning the good. There are so many people out there with opinions different than my own. What I love about the open forum for blogs is that I get to hear from people that I would not normally encounter in my life. We tend to congregate with people who are like us - I'm not being critical, that's just human nature. So, we tend to circulate the same themes amongst ourselves. I don't mean that we're all stagnant or unoriginal... It's more that I enjoy the chance to hear (and sometimes disagree with) new ideas. It challenges me to defend my own opinions, to form a more definitive outline for my idealogy and philosophy of life. As silly or insignificant as a blog may seem, it's actually having more of an impact on me than I expected. I think I blog for myself, to have an outlet for personal creativity and to remember that before I was a wife, a mother, a friend - that I was just me. Just Shannon. It's so easy to lose sense of self in the many roles that life requires of us.

Well, on that note, I'll say goodnite. I leave you with a pretty awesome haiku. I didn't write it, but maybe I'll try my hand at a few and see about putting them up.

Covered with the flowers,
Instantly I'd like to die
In this dream of ours!

~Etsujin.

Friday Five

Time for the Friday Five.

1. Do you remember your first best friend? Who was it?
Yes, it was Erin R. in the 2nd grade. She was a hoot - we made mom videotape us doing commercials for hairspray, pepto, anything laying around. Priceless footage, people, priceless.

2. Are you still in touch with this person? No, but I hear about her through her mother occasionally.

3. Do you have a current close friend? Rachel H.

4. How did you become friends with this person? Through Auburn Ave. Church and eventually I moved where she lives, and we go to church together.

5. Is there a friend from your past that you wish you were still in contact with? Why? Yes, Catherine M. - she was an incredible, beautiful, smart, and fun person to be around. Awww... now I'm really missing her.

I'd like to add: Most of my closest friends are my family, believe it or not. That's sounds corny, but it's true.

Newest Show

After seeing ads for this, I think we've got to quit watching cable. Sheesh.

Something Entirely Different

"what are you doing here?"

I love this webpage. You send this guy a phrase, and he creates artwork to accompany it. It's refreshing and unexpected!

Hello Morning!

A really nice way to start the day: tickling a very chubby baby.

Oh, Bleep!

I had to do this after reading that Courtney and Lisa's blog was rated "G". Wow. Hope there are none of the 12 and under set reading my blog. I think the youngest is 18, so I'm safe. No more nudie pics, I promise. And no more bleeping potty mouth either, I bleeping promise, you bleeping bleeps.

What rating is your journal?
brought to you by Quizilla

Crazies

How nice do you have to be to crazy people? I mean actual, certifiable nut cases? Our neighbor is so incredibly crazy and irritating, that I hide if I see her coming. And sadly, SHE'S A SCHOOL TEACHER, and out for the summer, so she's here all the time. The problem is, if I'm too nice, she wants to be here all day with this self-centered crazy talk, and I just can't do it. We can't go outside without her pouncing on us...

And as if the craziness wasn't enough, there is always something not quite right about her appearance that is REALLY hard to ignore. Like today, I guess she washed her hair because it was all fluffed up like... cotton pillow stuffing is all I can compare it to! (It was BIG! And not cute big like Texan women.) Or she has sunscreen dripping off one side of her face. Or she's poured cooking oil (no kidding) onto the top of her head. (why, you ask? I DON'T KNOW!!) Or the day she put on corpse makeup. (well, there was a mechanic coming over, after all) I've finally gotten used to the fact that she wears ONLY purple shirts and black pants. (shortsleeves for summer, though)

I don't know. I don't want to be unkind, but what's the rule here?

Pabst

This guy drinks Pabst... maybe all you fellas need to rethink taking a swig of that Blue Ribbon seeing as he's the poster-boy for Mulletsgalore.

Aww... shucks!

You know what I really, really hate? When you have something good, like a pack of peanut m&m;'s and you are almost done with them (and relishing each one because you're doing sugarbusters and you've only allowed yourself one cheat this week) and you think you've got one more, but you look, and you DON'T! You would have really savored that last one, made it last... and you can't. You blew it.

That sucks.

Product Endorsement

When Patrick and I got married, my aunt gave us a basketfull of Shaklee cleaning products. I don't know if you've ever heard of Shaklee, I had not until then. They aim to have the most environmentally healthy products - Greenpeace will only use Shaklee to clean the decks of their ships because it's safe to wash right into the ocean.

Anyway, after nearly 7 years of marriage, I've rarely had to replace these items. And no- it's not that I am not cleaning up! This stuff is just so powerful that you don't need much of it. Their vitamins are off the wall too - totally water soluble. Anywhoo, you can check out my aunt's site here.

Ask the Dogg...

Let Snoopdogg translate your website from the shizzle to the shiznat. Just enter your url and click the shizilator. It's hilarious!

Via Josiah at Irresponsible Journalism

That Boy We Love

You never know what you might find floating in your pool. Just ask Eric Riccardi, who woke up one morning to find Batboy floating on a raft in his pool in Las Vegas after a recent escape from a research center. This was a while back, about a year after they discovered Batboy in a cave in West Virginia.

Scientist had concluded that Batboy was obviously from a tribe of subterranean creatures evolved from bats. What clued them in was his big ears, massive eyes, fear of the light, and the fact that he ate his weight in insects in a single day.

I guess he overcame his fear of the light, because Batboy has gone on to make some contributions to society in the daytime. Did you know that he served in the military in the war in Afghanistan? Oh yeah, it was special ops, if I recall correctly. I remember he wore a bandana that was the US flag. Beautiful.

However, Batboy isn't always on the right side of the law. Recently, he was reported to have stolen a car and gone on a tri-state joyride. He is also supplementing his diet with donuts, as he was sighted in an Indiana donut shop while eluding police officers.

But the Badboy Batboy does have a softer side. Sources say that he has a crush on Jenna Bush, yes, the daughter of G.W. The Secret Service has kept Batboy away from Jenna on three different occasions, and has warned him that they will shoot if he attempts to kiss or bite Jenna.

Apparently, biting is a thing with Batboy. A reporter for the World News just happened to witness a brutal attack by Batboy directed at 10 year old girl. Now, granted, the girl started it by throwing a rock at Batboy, but still. Shame on you Batboy. The reporter, after clicking a few memorable **shots, came to the rescue of the girl by throwing a garbage can at Batboy.

And somehow, in between eluding FBI and courting Jenna, Batboy has managed to find the time to become involved in politics. He burst into the headquarters of Al Gore during the Presidential campaign and as an aide explained: "Bat Boy can't talk, of course - but he showed us in his own inimitable way that he was there to endorse our man. He started screeching and excitedly pointing at a 'Gore for President' sign and shaking his head 'yes, yes, yes."

Unfortunately, Batboy has met with an accident as of late. He was hit by an exterminators truck and sprayed with pesticide by the frightened driver. He seems to be recovering though, and you can send him a get well card to wish him well.

Wow. Batboy has lead a rich, eventful life. They should make a musical out of it. Oh wait. They did.

I don't know about you, but I'll be waiting with an eager heart for the next headline. Anyone want to make a prediction on it?

**scroll to bottom of page

A Regular Comedian

Yesterday, in the midst of some Indian whooping, Wrenn said, "You're funny, Mama"... it was the best thing I heard all day! I was flattered and warm and fuzzy - until I remembered that she also laughed for thirty minutes at the Jell-O we had for a snack...

Jell-O can be pretty funny, though.

BTW: That link is to a Jell-O Museum... do we really need a museum for Everything??? Does Jell-O even keep that long???

Oopsie

No, you're not dsylexic .... I did something weird to my blog. I have to get some help, so just hang tight. (This is me learning Movable Type... please be patient!)

Update: I fixed it. I don't know how, but I'm not asking questions. Yay me!

Smarty Pants

Here's a fun little game. It's 20 questions, which I actually thought was pretty boring as a kid, but this one is played against the computer. Finally, a competitor worth my precious time!
See if you can trick the computer. I fooled him 4 out of 5 times. My conclusion: I'm smarter than all the computers in the world... nanny nanny boo boo.

You can't see me, but I am also sticking out my tongue.

Biscuits from Scratch

Patrick is on his way at this very moment, to pick up Wrenn from a week at the grandparent's house. I know she had a wonderful time, playing with cousins and getting royally spoiled... but I'll be glad to have her home again. It's just TOO quiet without her here. Besides, our regular "Simpsons" vege-out time just isn't the same without her.

However, while she was away, we did indulge ourselves in movies, books, and other toddler-free activities. Patrick sent me to the movie rental store on Friday and his last words were: "Get us a horror movie". Ugh. Horror is pretty low on my list.

Well, I guess being a holiday, there just wasn't much of a selection, and to be honest, I didn't look REAL hard for a horror movie. What did catch my eye though, was the "New Swiss Family Robinson". It looked so tempting, with a picture of the Tree House on the cover...

I can't imagine a more exciting adventure. There is something about the man vs. nature theme that captivates us. Especially if the characters have to learn survival skills, mastering their environment, getting down and dirty with mother nature, baking biscuits from scratch... This is why I also loved "Frontier House" on PBS. They threw four families out into the wilderness with all the equiptment and skills of the average 1883 pioneer. It was miles above the present day reality shows we are all so addicted to!

I was thrilled to learn that PBS has a new similar show, called "The Pioneer Quest: A Year in the Old West". It comes on Tuesdays 8/9 central. It only has two families, and they spend an entire year on this project. It's a little different than Frontier House, but the premise is the same.

The next one is Colonial House, which follows the same format as Frontier House. They are currently interviewing families who want to do this, so if you are interested in seeing if you're up to the challenge, check out the website. If our situation were a little different, I'd jump at the chance. It sounds like an incredible experience.

Well, suffice it to say, I brought back "Swiss Family Robinson". Patrick said that was the last time he sent me to the movie store by myself. He doesn't know that he's just lucky I didn't sign us up on the wagon train!

Blogitus

That title sounds so gross. oh well.

Seems that once you start reading blogs, you can't resist the urge to have one! So, please welcome my sister, Ashley - she's gettin' funky with Swaying Daisies!

And by the way, have you guys registered at Blogtree? It's a blog genealogy site, where you list the website that encouraged you to start blogging, and it creates one huge "family tree". I don't know what we are going to do with this family tree, but it will probably be important. Someday. To someone. It could save a life. You never know.

By the way, if you click on the Blogtree logo at the bottom of this page, you will see my "pedigree".

I Packed My Bags

Hey everyone. Have you missed me? Blogger broke up with me last week... it was painful, but for the best. Now Chattablogs and I are going out some, nothing serious, just hanging out. Right now things look a little plain here, but you know me, and I'll be glitzing it up as soon as I figure out how. For now, it's just good to be back... -sniff-sniff- ... I missed you guys...

And no, it's not a rebound thing. Chattablogs is special. I think Chattablogs is "The One", cross your fingers.

Rattling On

I don't know if I mentioned the fact that Wrenn is away at her Grandparent's this week, leaving us home with only the Bruiser. I have to admit, my day is vastly different without her around. It's so... quiet. I have more time than I know what to do with, so of course I've been wasting it all browsing like a mad man. The internet is way too addictive. It's like a novel you just can't put down, and it has no conclusion! Ever! It just keeps going! -sigh- I wish I could get paid to browse- that would be sweet.

I've done one other thing this week since Wrenn is gone. I've indulged in some soap operas- gasp!

I occasionally watch Days of Our Lives anyway... just for something to do while I eat lunch. I used to watch Passions, before Scoo was old enough to notice, but I had to give it up. It was and continues to be, the stupidest soap opera of all time. I think, and hope, that most people watch it just to make fun of it. Days has it's moments as well. Anyway, I've picked up a few things watching these shows, and of course, since anything is game for blog material, I've created a list. I like lists. I LOVE lists. If I can make a list out of something, I am durn well going to do it.

Things I wish I could tell a Soap Opera Character:

1. If you are going to get married, just accept the fact that your half sister is going to interrupt the ceremony with news that either your husband to be is her baby's daddy, or that your husband is somehow your brother so you're about to commit incest.

2. If you are angry, and you storm off in a car, or possibly a motorcycle, you WILL have an accident, everyone will convene at the hospital, and probably spend some time in the hospital chapel crying pretty tears, and amazingly, you will not die.

3. The chances are pretty great that, for some reason, your pregnant best friend is faking it with a tummy pillow, or has hired a pregnant woman to have plastic surgery to look just like her. (A variation on this theme is an unknown twin sister...)

4. There is ALWAYS someone standing in the cracked doorway. SHUT the door if you don’t want everyone to hear your evil plans and secrets. As a matter of fact, just stop talking aloud to yourself and that takes care of a multitude of problems.

5. Bad guys never die. It may appear so, but that's their nature, they trick you. They can die repeatedly. And if they DO actually die, (which I just don't believe is possible) they always have a son ready to take over their evil ways. Beware.

6. If you are trying to rescue someone, or find them, chances are, they can hear you talking. Just wait ONE MORE SECOND, and try to listen harder, because they are stupidly whispering "help... help" in their quietest voice.

7. Don't leave incriminating items, like manila envelopes with photos of your affair, out where just ANYBODY might see them. And in that vein, under a couch cushion is not a good hiding place for these things either.

8. Maybe you should move, because your town is prone to freakish, natural disasters at least twice a year, see number 2 for accident protocol.

9. You don't have to celebrate every single freaking holiday with gusto. It's okay to skip the Arbor Day Party, or the Valentine's Day Party, or President's Day Party, or National Secretary's Day.

10. And finally, enough with the dramatic pauses! We know the writers are just lazy and filling up time, but please. You can only look perplexed for about a minute before you start to look pretty retarded.

Well that's my two cents for today.

Blah Blah Blah

I want to know what You, the people of this United Blogdom, are looking for in a blog. Is it links? Cause I got links, Baby. Here are a few for today:

Are you Sherwin Williams material? Try the Paint Game.

Get artsy fartsy with the one word project.

See what ads Google would put on your website if you wanted to make some dough.

So you can't travel the world? Well, maybe your book can.

Okay, is that enough for you people? Are you satisfied yet? No? Well sheesh, go visit Christin's blog then. I hear she's up to 65 hits a day.

An Apple a Day

Things you can do with an apple:

Put it on your head and let somebody shoot it off with an arrow
Cook up some apple fritters for your cowboy friends
Check the "girl" to make sure she doesn't have an Adam's apple
Put some poison in it and give it to your rival so you'll be the fairest in the land
Test how American someone is
Use it to keep a doctor away
Let one fall on your head and discover a law of gravity
Compare them to oranges
Get together a gang and call yourselves the Apple Dumpling Gang
Give it to a teacher
Mash it up and feed it to Grandpa or the baby
See how far it falls from the tree
Bob for it
Name your city a Big one
Put a cute little worm in it and use it as a library or school graphic
Put a pot on your head and become a tree planting legend
Make hard cider out of them to get your groove on during the Prohibition
Eat it when you aren't supposed to and damn all of mankind

Well, that was a fruitless activity. . . (tee hee) but it was fun.