January 26, 2004

No More!

I don't ever want to see another can of vegetables ever again. That stuff is heavy, and all of the bending, lifting, etc., that I've done today is killing me. We had to do 24 units of canned vegetables today, and we only got about 10 of them done, so that's 14 left to do tomorrow. Ugh. I think I'm going to beg to be put on another line. I know I'll probably be much more sore in the morning than I am now.

Other than hurting in places I didn't even know existed, everything's okay here. I wish it was Wednesday, though. That's when I get my first paycheck. I have about a dollar to my name right now, so Wednesday better come fast! I wouldn't have even had that dollar if I hadn't found it in the console in my car this morning. This must be my lucky day!

January 20, 2004

Things That Make You Go "Hmmmm"

Why do they air the State of the Union address on 30 different channels? I think that it's something that should be televised, but not on every single channel. Geez.

During the little bit of the State of the Union Address that I actually watched, I noticed that there was a lot of clapping and cheering going on at times that I wouldn't have thought to clap. Do they have one of those applause signs that lights up when they want you to clap?

And could somebody please send Bush back to elementary school and teach him how to pronounce words correctly? Nothing annoys me more than when someone mispronounces a word.

January 19, 2004

I Like It So Far

My first day of work went pretty well. I expected my feet to be hurting after standing on them for eight hours (I'm so not used to that), but they don't hurt at all. I had a headache all day long, but that was left over from reading so much last night. I need glasses, but I have to wait until my insurance kicks in before I can get them.

I need to get back to studying now. Evenings and weekends are the only times I'll have to do my school work. I've got 12 hours worth of courses, and it seems like they require much more time than regular lecture courses would. I'm enjoying independant study, though. I get bored during lectures and miss a lot of them, plus I like to move a little faster than everybody else does.

I had physics as an independant study course in high school. It was during my junior year, and I had moved from Alabama to Tennessee right after the second semester started. Physics was an actual class at the school I moved from, but the one I moved to didn't even offer it. So, since I'd already started, I had to finish it on my own. I did have a teacher to help when I needed it, but I was in her room during her planning period, so she was gone for the most part. I covered a lot alone, and I think I understood it a litte more than I normally would have. I averaged a 98 for the entire course, so I guess I did pretty well.

I got off on a tangent there, didn't I? Okay, now I'm going to get back to studying.

January 16, 2004

I Got a Job! Yeah!

I start work Monday at General Mills. $7 is a lot less than what I made at my last job, but it's better than nothing. I'm happy now!

I went to Chattanooga and back twice today. I had to go pick up my financial aid check so I could buy my books. I couldn't get it cashed at the bookstore because I would've had more than $300 left after I bought my books, so I had to go find a First Tennessee bank. Well, I found one, but they couldn't cash it because my 2 forms of ID weren't good enough for them. I had my drivers' license and social security card, but they wanted my license and my student ID. Wouldn't you know I left my student ID at home? I had to drive all the way back to South Pittsburg and get my checked cashed, then all the way back to school to buy my books. Needless to say, I'm tired of driving!

Because of all of that hassle today, I've decided that I need to move to Chatt, or at least somewhere closer. My school is in Chattanooga, my new job is in Tiftonia (which is basically Chatt.), so I might as well live there. Now if I only had the money to move I'd be set.

January 15, 2004

I Forgot

I'm really good at forgetting things sometimes. So, since I forgot to post them the other night, here are some of the pictures from Arien's birthday party.

Oh, and Jenny, you should thank me. I did manage to snap a picture of you when you weren't looking, but I won't post it. I thought about it, though.

Click to enlarge.

Diggin' In


I think I spent more time cleaning up her mess than actually having the party.


Gracie and Mini Jenny


Freshly bathed and opening presents. Yeah, that's me in the picture.

January 12, 2004

@#%&!!

It's back to school today. Well, actually it's time to log in to my online course. Should be easy, right? I mean, this course costs twice as much as a normal course does, so you'd figure they'd at least have a good enough server to handle the load. Well, they don't. I've been lucky enough to get in about twice today, and both of those times it's been extremely slow (I have dsl, it shouldn't be slow), and then it won't work at all. This is really freaking annoying!

I dropped my other online course and decided to take it on campus. It's CS 101 (stupid required class. I know all this stuff already, I wish I could've tested out), and I would've had to buy Office XP professional, and I couldn't afford that. The class is on Thursday nights only, so I should be able to manage it.

I have to go all the way to the main campus in Chattanooga tomorrow to pick up the course materials for one of my video classes. When I called and requested the materials for two classes, they only sent the materials for one. I called them back, and they still haven't sent the rest of it. I'm tired of waiting, so I'm just going up there.

I have pictures from Arien's party to post, but I'm going to wait until later tonight. For now, I'm going to try logging in again. There's a ton of stuff I need to print out.

January 08, 2004

One Year Ago Today

My baby is a year old today. It seems like I only brought her home yesterday, but in a way it feels like she's been with us forever. I'm so happy she's with me, and I love her so much.

We'll be having a little get-together Saturday (Jenny, don't forget) at my dad's. It won't be anything special, but you have to have a party for a first birthday. She's with her Daddy right now (Gracie wouldn't go), and I wish he'd hurry up and bring her home. I want to spend some of today with her at least!

January 06, 2004

I Thought I Wasn't Going Back

Before I lost my job I had been thinking about taking this semester off from school so I could work more hours, then I lost my job and I thought that I'd never be able to go back. I know I'll never find another job as flexible as that one was, and it would take something like that for me to be able to go to school, work, and raise kids. I love school, and I was heartbroken that I wouldn't be able to go back.

I signed up on Families First a couple of months ago because that was the only way I could get help with daycare, and now that I'm unemployed, I have to go to their "school" and do a bunch of stupid stuff that supposed to help me find a job. I don't see how any of that's going to help me get a job, but that's not the point I'm trying to make. Their "schol" is on our campus of my school, and while I was sitting there doing a ridiculously easy math test, and I started thinking about how I wish that I had something more challenging than that to do. So, I decided to go talk to someone about finding a way for me to be able to go to school.

I went, and now I'm officially back in school. I'm going to finish my associates degree in an independant study program. I hope that by the time I have to transfer to another school that my situation will be better, and I'll be able to go to school, but for right now I'm happy with this. An associates degree is better than nothing, right?

January 05, 2004

Child Support Office, Here I Come

Back in September, Wayne moved and wouldn't tell me where he lived, but because I'm extremely skilled in the art of interrogation, I finally got one of his friends to tell me where he lived. So, I called the child support office and told them approximately where he was living and where he worked. There wasn't much they could do since I didn't have the exact address of either, so all of that snooping was in vain.

Well, my friends, he's done it again. He told me that he might be moving somewhere because his Granny bitched at him after I told her what he did before, but he did not ever tell me that he actually moved. I found out tonight that he did, and I even found out the specific apartment. That's nothing special, though, right? Well, he made a big mistake this time because I know the exact address down to the apartment number without anyone telling me.

I used to live in the same apartment complex that he moved into. I even lived in the very same building, directly above the apartment he is in now. You better believe that as soon as I drop the girls at daycare in the morning, I'm heading for the child support office to tell them about the change in person. No phone calls this time. I want to make sure that they know. Then, I'm going to start calling every day until they either make him pay, or put him in jail. Either would be fine with me.

I'm extremely pissed right now because of him. The same little birdie that told me where he had moved, also told me that he and Daphne both now have new cell phones. Hmmm, he can afford to get cell phones, but he can't afford to pay his child support. Is it just me, or is there something wrong with this picture?

I'm not even going to start on everything else I want to say about him right now. I'd be sitting here typing all night long if I did. And now I must go find something to do to keep me busy and help me to resist the urge to go to his apartment and slap the shit out of him.

Job Searching Sucks

I've been doing the job search thing all morning long. I've found quite a few jobs that I think I would be really good at, and that I might actually enjoy. Just one problem, though - They all require at least one year of experience in whatever field they are in, and I haven't been in that field before. So, I just have one question - how in the hell is one supposed to get experience for a job if she can't get a job like that without experience?

This is so frustrating!

January 04, 2004

Poor Kitty, Poor Gracie

As the girls and I were leaving to pick my mom up from work, I noticed that there was a cat sitting in a tree in our front yard. It saw me and started meowing, and that's when I knew it couldn't get out of the tree. I wasn't going to do anything about it until we got back, but Gracie saw it too and begged me to help it. I couldn't reach it from the ground, so I got a chair to stand in off the porch, but I still couldn't quite reach it. I stood there for a good five minutes trying to get the cat to come down just a little bit so I could grab it, but I never was able to get it. That cat sure was happy to see me, though. It purred and rubbed against the tree the whole time I stood there.

I knew my mom would be mad if I wasn't there when she walked out the door, so I had to leave the cat in the tree and go get her. Gracie didn't like that at all, but I finally convinced her that it would be okay while we were gone. She talked about that cat the whole time we were waiting for my mom.

"I'm going to ask Nana if I can keep her," she said. "I'll make her a bed, and feed her, and play with her all the time. I'm going to name her Buttercup because that's my Power Puff Girl name."

When my mom got in the car, Gracie repeated all of that to her. She even convinced her to let her keep the cat when we got it down, but mom told her she probably wouldn't be able to bring it in the house. That was just fine with Gracie, though. She was just excited that she was getting a cat!

I had no idea how I was going to get that cat down. I couldn't reach it from the ground, I couldn't reach it standing in a chair, and it sure wasn't coming down on it's own. I thought about going to my dad's and getting a ladder, but that was too much trouble, and I didn't want to bother him. I tried holding Gracie up and letting her get it, but she started freaking out when I got her half way up. She's afraid of heights, something she inherited from my Grandpa. I even tried to lure that darn cat down with a Chicken McNugget. That didn't work either.

Then, it finally dawned on me - I could back my car up to the tree and stand on the back of it. Why didn't I think of that before? Too simple, I guess. It took a lot of trial and error (I didn't want to back into the tree), and a lot of yelling at Gracie to stay on the porch (really didn't want to back into her), but I finally got it just right and was able to climb up and retrieve the cat.

Gracie was jumping for joy when I climbed down off the car and brought the cat over to her. That's when I noticed that the spot on it's side that I thought was a dark patch in it's otherwise white fur wasn't what I thought it was. The cat had a hole in it's side and was bleeding. It looked like something had bit a chunk out of it. No wonder it was in that tree. Gracie noticed it at the same time, and she ran to the porch screaming, "Oh, my poor kitty" and started crying her eyes out.

I put the cat down and went to her, and she started screaming at me that I had hurt her cat. I explained to her that it was already like that, and that was probably the reason that it was in the tree in the first place. She assumed that some dog had tried to eat it, and started talking about hunting the dog down and shooting it.

My poor baby has been worried about that cat all night. She wants to "take it to the hospital" so they can make it better. I wish I could, but I can't afford to right now. How do you explain to a 4 year old that you're too broke to save her new pet? I think she understood, though. She's been sick with grief over that cat, and I don't know how to make her feel better. She didn't even want to go to the store to buy candy.

The last time I looked out, the cat was sitting on the porch. It looked at me like it was saying, "Well, you got me down, aren't you going to come out here and pet me?" Poor thing. It acts as if there's nothing wrong with it, though. If it's still here in the morning, I'll go buy it some food and maybe I'll try to doctor it's wound. That ought to make Gracie happy again.

January 03, 2004

I thought it was January

Apparently I was wrong. It's 70 degrees outside, and it's enirely too hot in here. It's supposed to be cold in January, and I like it when it's cold, so it must not really be January. I feel like the whole world is playing a joke on me. Well, not really, but I do find it strange that it's so warm this time of year. I miss the cold!

fun fun fun

I had a pretty good day today. I went out with Jenny and a couple of other people and goofed off all day. Jenny got plastered, and she's always hilarious when she's drunk. She did a couple of things that I really, really want to tell, but I've been sworn to secrecy, and she'd kill me if I did. As usual, I was the only sober one in the group and I ended up being the designated driver. You know, it's hard to drive when you've got a car full of crazy people.

Speaking of cars, I finally got my brakes fixed today. That was my Christmas present from my dad. Yeah, it actually stops now. I've been driving around with weird brakes for so long, and now I'm having a hard time getting used to having good ones. I almost threw myself through the windshield a couple of times on the way home. It's pretty bad when it's harder to drive a car that actually works right that one that doesn't.

I've been writing this entry for an hour, but I keep getting sidetracked. I had plenty of things in my mind that I wanted to write about, and now I can't think of any of them. I guess that's what happens when your hungry. I'm going to go see what I can scrounge up to eat. Don't get me wrong, we've got plenty of food, it's just that there's nothing in there that I want.

January 01, 2004

Little Liar

Gracie has been lying a lot lately. Not just little white lies, but bad lies. This morning she got into something she wasn't supposed to, and I got on to her, and she started back talking me. Well, that's something that I just will not take off of her, so I spanked her and sent her in the bedroom. Of course, sending her in the bedroom doesn't do any good because my mom always lets her out 2 minutes later. When she came out of the bedroom, she climbed up in my mom's lap and told her that I had choked her.

I have not ever and will not ever choke my child. Why did she say that? The worst part was that my mom believed her, and no matter how much I've tried to tell her that I didn't choke her, she still won't believe me. What kind of person does she think I am? I don't know what pissed me off more, that Gracie lied or that my mom believed her instead of me.

Gracie gets more and more out of control every day. She won't listen to a thing I say, she throws huge tantrums, she's mean to Arien, and is just a little brat in general. I hate taking her in stores with me because she screams and cries and acts like I'm killing her because I make her ride in the buggy. I can't let her walk beside me because she knocks things off shelves on purpose, picks things up and puts them in her mouth, or runs off.

I know part of this is because of my mom and stepdad. I can't discipline her at all when they're around. If I scold her, they yell at me and say I'm being mean to her. I really catch hell if I have to spank her. They don't get mad until she does something to them, and then it's all my fault that she acts that way, and if I try to tell them that it's because they baby her that get pissed at me. I just can't win with them, I swear.

All of this is made worse by the fact that I don't have a job, and I'm broke and stuck in this house all of the time. If I don't find a job soon, I'm going to go insane. Everywhere I've applied has told me that they won't be hiring until after the first of the year, and it's after the first of the year now, so maybe I can find one soon. Unemployment sucks big time.