This review of a Roomba takes a left turn..

Roomba 530 Vacuum Robot Product Review page 9

It's just one step away from actually arming these robots with live firearms, then setting them loose on the streets in military or even domestic law enforcement roles.

everyone, please try it..

Let me google that for you

Great American happenings this week

'She's With Me': Obama Writes Girl Absence Note - Political News - FOXNews.com

'She's With Me': Obama Writes Girl Absence Note
Ten-year-old Kennedy Corpus has a rock-solid excuse for missing the last day of school: a personal note to her teacher from President Barack Obama.

He got in the spirit by donning a camouflage suit and got his head shaved by Gen. Raymond Odierno, who is also a guest on one of the shows. The Montclair resident is a big supporter of the troops on and off camera. He tells the Times: "The best way I can show gratitude is to do my show the best I can and make them laugh.

Signs you're procrastinating on schoolwork...

1. You have more than 10 tabs open in Firefox (really more than 3 is too much).
2. You're Google Reader list is at 0.
3. You can't find anything new to look at on Facebook.
4. You've retaken Facebook quizzes to improve your score.
5. You're household chores are actually finished.

Others?

John Mercer getting tasered

The best part of this is the necktie..

Bust blog plagiarism..

This is great:

Stop Plagiarism in 3 Easy Steps | Internet Marketing Strategy: Conversation Marketing

Even better here:

This is why you don't steal from Cracked.com

Proactive content sharing from Monty Python

It's about time somebody was up front about sharing their content on YouTube.

YouTube: And Now For Something Completely Different on YouTube

I always knew bottled water was wasteful..

Space Station Gets Pee-Recycling System | Wired Science from Wired.com

It currently costs roughly $10,000 to ship a pint of fresh water to space, the money savings will be huge. Moreover, the system is part of a plan to expand the number of residents the space station can accommodate from three to six.

Funny 90s video remix

Under The Bridge: Literal Video Version

Chad Vader news

Will Chad Vader Go To Youtube Live?

Democratic Flu State

Google Flu Trends
Is this a map of flu activity or the democratic takeover of the executive branch and congress?

Internet Addiction

So, even with my recent abstinence from Facebook, I'm still pretty addicted to being onine, especially when I'm avoiding something. At least in China I might be able to get treatment.Health: Chinese Doctors Officially Classify Symptoms of Internet Addiction

"Eighty percent of addicts can be cured with treatment, which usually lasts about three months," said Tao. He did not describe the treatment, however.

Stupid Lifehacker articles..

Don't get me wrong, Lifehacker can be great, but this article is a good example of the extreme timesuck that this or any blog can be. Here's an interesting entry on cake in a cup:Food Hacks: Microwave an Instant Chocolate Cake in a Coffee Mug
But check out the close of the story:

Actually, it was kind of gross. The texture much less cake-y than one would expect and much more gummy than you'd ever want. I also made the mistake of using some fancy-pants hot chocolate mix from Jacques Torres back in Brooklyn that clearly wasn't meant to be microwaved with an egg.

Obama supporters realize how empty their lives are...

Obama Win Causes Obsessive Supporters To Realize How Empty Their Lives Are | The Onion - America's Finest News Source
Seriously though..

Obama Win Causes Obsessive Supporters To Realize How Empty Their Lives Are

Obama facts

Obama Facts: Truth or Smear? - Funny Videos | Cracked.com

Obama Facts: Truth or Smear? -- powered by Cracked.com

I'm a PC at Apple Stores

Microsoft placing "I'm a PC" recording booths outside Apple stores - Engadget

The Apple / Microsoft ad war keeps escalating -- while Apple continues to insist that John Hodgman is the human representation of all PCs, Microsoft is taking its populist approach to the streets. Very specific streets, actually -- it's placing "I'm a PC" recording booths outside of Apple stores, like the one pictured here in Birmingham, England. The booth is staffed with three 'Softies who'll try to sell you on the latest in Windows tech while making nyah-nyah faces at Apple store patrons, and guests are invited to make a short video explaining why they, too, are PCs. Not to be outdone, Apple has pledged to send Justin Long to your house to charmingly condescend to you about his various abilities while still pretending to be your best friend.

John Hodgman on TEDTalks

John Hodgman's brief digression | Video on TED.com

I might argue that, technically, every pile is atomic.

Onion News - Tells it like it is

Gunman Kills 15 Potential Voters In Crucial Swing State | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Gunman Kills 15 Potential Voters In Crucial Swing State

Meep to Joy

YouTube - Ode To Joy

Oh no you didn't post that song that sticks in my head..

Seriously, don't watch this, it will stick in your head for days.

I warned you..

Funny Unaltered Photos

15 Images You Won't Believe Aren't Photoshopped | Cracked.com

What appears to be some normal-sized machine cropped and pasted onto a skyline is actually a gigantic machinized monstrosity designed for excavation by some Germans. Those things that look like saw teeth big enough to cut down the Empire State Building are actually buckets, each of which could pretty much scoop up your whole house.

If this thing's secretly a transformer, we're screwed.

Brendan Fraser is lame...

Great stuff..
» Proof Brendan Fraser Is The Happiest Man Alive | Cracked.com

What I Want To Be When I Grow Up
By Brendan Fraser, Age 8

When I grow up, I want to be a movie actor...The reason I think I can be an actor is because I have normal expectations. I don’t want to be a big dramatic actor, or even a big action star. All I want is to be that guy that people know his face, and some people know his name, but most people just go “oh, yeah, that guy.” This is my dream.

This guy spent a year living biblically

TED | TEDBlog: My year of living biblically: A.J. Jacobs on TED.com

Speaking at the most recent EG conference, author, philosopher, prankster and journalist A.J. Jacobs talks about the year he spent living biblically -- following the rules in the Bible as literally as possible.

Manufacturing plant locates in Chattanooga: Entire community pats itself on back..

VW Newsroom: VOLKSWAGEN GROUP OF AMERICA ANNOUNCES IT WILL PRODUCE CARS IN CHATTANOOGA; DECISION MARKS COMPANY’S ONGOING COMMITMENT TO NORTH AMERICAN MARKET

I'm pretty sure my dry-cleaner has a clipping from the newspaper about how he was also instrumental in this achievement..

World of World of Warcraft

'Warcraft' Sequel Lets Gamers Play A Character Playing 'Warcraft' | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

You actually believe you're in a dimly lit basement staring at a computer screen.

Mainstream Media Spot

YouTube - jonlajoie's Channel

Christian Copyright Issues

Not that these issues are different for anyone else, but here is an interesting debate sparked by someone doing what I've been doing with my Sunday morning Bible class, which is to use movie clips to introduce a topic for discussion.

Using video clips before a bible study... | Geeks & God

Basically it boils down to, Does fair use work any differently for religious educational groups and in what settings?

To totally disregard copyright laws check this out:

American chinese food becomes official chinese food

Kung pao chicken made official for Olympics | Oddly Enough | Reuters

"Bean curd made by a pock-marked woman," as the Beijing Youth Daily rendered the spicy Sichuanese dish, is now "Mapo tofu." And "chicken without sexual life" becomes mere "steamed pullet."

Weird drug slang

While researching for a short script I found this:

By using current slang terms, Dunbar is trying to tell his children, 'I'm "hip" or "down," and you can talk to me about anything,'" Mayhan said. "He is unaware that his stilted speaking style, belabored references, and frequent incorrect usage of terms leave his children more confused than reassured.

pressured into attending a raver party, where kids dance and take party drugs like truck driver, co-pilot, Georgia home boy, and doctor.

Moral: Don't do this kind of research at 4 in the morning.
While high.

J/k

Good question about Arthur

The Journal of Cartoon Over-analyzations

In America, we no longer practice servitude and slavery. No one will argue that point–things aren’t equal by any means, but we don’t force others into a slaveship. In these cartoons, they show the characters with pets, generally a dog or cat or a fish. I find this wrong. I realize that they are merely illustrating humans through the animals, but by giving the animals pets, they are saying that not all creatures are allowed equal rights.

Arthur has a pet dog named Pal. What makes Arthur and his friends and family above the species of dogs? Why was the puppy not enrolled in preschool with the rest and given the chance at an education?

Wii dominance

The 7 Commandments All Video Games Should Obey - Page 7 | Cracked.com

Here are the three competing new-gen consoles, adjusted so that their size roughly reflects how powerful their hardware is in relation to each other.

Here are the same three consoles, adjusted so that their size reflects their worldwide sales in 2007:

Funny, until you realize that most Wii games could actually be played in a browser with Flash. Get me a Wiimote for my PC and I'm all set.

Videogames are bad..

25 Rejected Ideas From Grand Theft Auto IV | Cracked.com

ASCII Star Wars

This is pretty great. Colors were reversed in Terminal on my Mac, but I guess it doesn't really matter.
Friday Fun: Watch Star Wars in Text via Telnet

from any command line, type telnet towel.blinkenlights.nl and sit back to watch the show

Posted by cmwillis at 11:50 PM |

Somebody did my idea..

..for a documentary about a documentary. YouTube - Documentary on Making a Documentary

Documentary on Making a Documentary

Jimmy James don't like Comcast

Can anybody find a link to the anti-Comcast commercial by AT&T or their lobbyists starring Stephen Root, AKA Jimmy James from NewsRadio?
Good stuff..

Stephen Root (I)

YouTube HQ

This script is a little daunting (just the webpage, the install on Firefox was incredibly simple), but YouTube videos with actual watchable quality is great.
YouTube H.264 - Userscripts.org

Get it and watch Kitty Bowl:

Stupid truck commercial

Why this is stupid? Two Zorbs weigh approximately 100 lbs. total.

They all add up to 23.. no wait, 33.

I counted up a mind-boggling eleven Channel 3 logos on the main page of WRCB TV's webpage. That's above the fold (before you scroll down). Only six 9's for NewsChannel 9, and five 12's for WDEF. At what point can we say, OK, I've got it.. There's your logo.. Can I see the weather now??

Colbert vs. Huckabee - AIR HOCKEY?!?

Huckabee on Colbert, Tyra - The Caucus - Politics - New York Times Blog

We're being taken over..

Am I the only one who notices this?

The weird thing is:


Carl Parkes -- FriskoDude: Hillary Adopts an Alien Baby

Celebrity Lookalikes..

Is it just me or is Josh Brolin a poor man's Kurt Russell?
No Country for Old Men (2007)

What's right for America - A Do-nothing President..

Great (although short) article on what the next president should be like and a strong endorsement for Thompson.
Copious Dissent - Your Daily Dose of Liberty: We Need a Lazy Politician

In my humble opinion, we need more politicians to get elected and do absolutely nothing. Make no compromises. Pass no bills. Make no laws. Make no press appearances. Do not even answer the phones. Just sit and stare out a window.

Posted by cmwillis at 2:11 PM |

Dangerous ice shards fall from tower

height="355">
FARK.com: Fark YouTube Player (3268396) Giant. Farking. Ice. Missiles. (video)

Excellent Philosophical Article - What is the Monkeysphere?

Pretty much somes up my opinions about other people's opinions..

What is the Monkeysphere? - Page 2 | Cracked.com

"So what exactly are we supposed to do about all this?"

First, train yourself to get suspicious every time you see simplicity. Any claim that the root of a problem is simple should be treated the same as a claim that the root of a problem is Bigfoot.

Posted by cmwillis at 10:42 AM |

We're here, we're geeks... Article on Geek Pride.

For non-geeks, it's definitely time to regroup -- OrlandoSentinel.com

Used to be, "geek" wasn't anything you wanted to be in life.

Posted by cmwillis at 10:32 AM |

My employees may hate me..

Ihatechris.com - The Best hate chris Resources and Information.They left this open on my desktop.

Funny caption site..

Caption Machine » Car pool
Look, no hands!

Go leave your own caption at the site above.

Sesame Street archives not appropriate for kids..

Virginia Heffernan - The Medium - Sesame Street - Television - Internet Video - Media - YouTube - New York Times

“These early ‘Sesame Street’ episodes are intended for grown-ups, and may not suit the needs of today’s preschool child.”

I always thought those monsters were a little scary..

Gogol Bordello - This is just weird..

I really like this band and wasn't totally opposed to Earth Aid or whatever it was called, but this is just weird.

YouTube - Eugene Hutz on music

But this is good:

"Working" really works!

Study Finds Working At Work Improves Productivity | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

The results showed across the board that working is 100 percent more productive than listening to music and checking e-mails, 100 percent more productive than meandering around the office socializing with coworkers, 100 percent more productive than playing online Sudoku, 100 percent more productive than watching YouTube videos of nostalgic childhood television programming, 100 percent more productive than reading celebrity-gossip blogs while chatting with friends on Instant Messenger, 100 percent more productive than napping, and 98.2 percent more productive than not showing up to work.

Posted by cmwillis at 6:44 PM |

Phil Specter

Use your iPhone to pick someone up..

How to Tweak Your IPhone to Impress Buddies, Mom and the Boss

ustomize your iPhone to help you...

...pick up a girl or guy

Set wallpaper to: A photo of your niece or nephew, if trying to meet women. This says "I love kids, but I don't have any." Picking up a guy? Easy. Load an image of booze, food, or a comic book character. Better yet, find one that features all three.

Add to your music: Air, Massive Attack, and the Magnetic Fields. The first two bands play make-out music; the last shows you've evolved a sense of humor about romance.

Add to your movies: A copy of Knocked Up says either "I'm not afraid of commitment" or "I totally understand you and your slovenly, loser friends."

Set your weather widget to: Cities you've always wanted to visit. Oh, wow — you've also dreamed of going to Madrid? We're soulmates!

The closer: Once your object of desire is interested, show them how to work the touchscreen by gently guiding their hands.

Police Squad water pistols

So Jackson and I were playing with squirt guns just now and he empties his gun then throws it at me just like on Police Squad. I laughed then spanked him.

"Police Squad!" (1982)

Live Earth thoughts.. UPDATED

SOS | Live Earth | 7.7.07

Madonna can play guitar? WHO GIVES A CRAP?!?

Is Will Ferrel the drummer for Red Hot Chili Peppers?

Apparently watching 18 hours of concert programming on TV is good for the environment.

Where did WolfMother come from? They rocked out.

Lenny Kravitz and the The Police are still pretty cool.

Is Duff pregnant?

To some people, OK liberals, Al Gore is the new messiah. Melissa Etheridge made this very clear.

Alicia Keys.. WOW!

Neil Finn of Crowded House handled the lights going out pretty well.

Cat "Yusef" Stevens - cool!

I would like to have seen Sting or Andy Summers push Kanye right off the stage.

Was Alec Baldwin in Hawaii?

Spinal Tap.. YES!!

Those scientists in Antarctica stole the show..

Some people say throwing 10 concerts around the world isn't doing anything to save the environment. I don't care, a show's a show. We'll see all the fallout with the right wing next week, but I tell you what, Al Gore could walk right into the presidency if he'd announced a run for the White House tonight. Oh well..

Let Love Rule!

Real nice China!

Geekologie - Greatest USB Drive Ever

Sad thing is, USB cables cost almost as much as flash memory..

GTD-Curious?

Again, what is it with the Getting Things Done crowd? Saw this in a comment about to-do lists..
Geek To Live: The art of the doable to-do list - Lifehacker

GTD-curious

Posted by cmwillis at 9:11 PM |

Transformer costumes: Not lame at all.

Kind of funny..

Publishing exec 'steals' Google laptops in silly demonstration - Engadget

Publishing exec 'steals' Google laptops in silly demonstration

Productivity Porn?

Life Hacks: Marc Andreessen's guide to personal productivity - Lifehacker

These people are sick! I'm starting an anti-productivity category on my blog immediately. Fight the power!

Retired Gen. George Washington Criticizes Bush's Handling Of Iraq War

The very genius of the American presidency is that it is an office held by an elected representative of the people, not by a monarch who can rule by fiat and enact policy at will," Washington said.

More from The Onion.

Another orb function

Orb works TiVo with DVR Everywhere - Engadget

I'm just saying.. Orb does everything. Last night it assimilated my DVR recordings and wouldn't let me watch Lost. I gladly obey the Orb.

More crazy editing..

YouTube - Message to the YouTube Editors: Lazydork is Still the Best

This is great:

Catfish tries to eat basketball

Yeah, what's the deal with Radio Shack?

Even CEO Can't Figure Out How RadioShack Still In Business | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

FORT WORTH, TX—Despite having been on the job for nine months, RadioShack CEO Julian Day said Monday that he still has "no idea" how the home electronics store manages to stay open.

Posted by cmwillis at 3:11 PM |

Flying Manta Ray..

YouTube - Flying Manta Ray

Flying Manta Ray

Fun with lasers!

Graffiti Research Lab » L.A.S.E.R. Tag

Apt analogy for Twitter

Wasn't sure where he was going with this, but I think he nailed it. Check out the article by Steve Bryant.
Google Watch - Today in Stupid - Twitter Is Dodgeball, but Boring

Of all the masturbatory ego-fluffers on the Web, nothing chafes me worse than Twitter.

Well, at least I'm just a blogger, so I'm only half as lame.

powered by performancing firefox

How to Deal With an Existential Crisis

Jim's blog led me to this link, which has really helped me a lot. How to Deal With an Existential Crisis - WikiHow

My favorite part is:

# Whatever you do, don't kill, cut, or maim yourself. Don't make any permanent changes because of temporary problems: destroying the only copy of your novel or getting a facial tattoo is unacceptable. If you want to get in a fight with your parents, dye your hair blue.

powered by performancing firefox

Posted by cmwillis at 10:02 PM |

Not for the faint of heart

What's in my poo?

Good things come..

...to those who wait long enough:

I'll never read or watch news on a television again..

powered by performancing firefox

Jesus Hair

Here is some footage of me rockin' the Jesus hair and beard at Xmas 1995. I think I just got some new boots..

Here is another one of me graduating High School. Sad thing is, I look exactly like a McCallie boy would today. I was rebel back then though..

So, I've been converting old family VHS tapes to DVD for my Dad since the kids are away on Spring Break this week. I didn't want them to see anything silly, but now I've decided to just show everyone. Stay tuned for more.

Painting Missiles..

    WIRED Blogs: Danger Room

Also just trying out this new extension from Performancing.  Adds image buttons, WYSIWYG layout, and can easily add multiple category tags.  Neat!

powered by performancing firefox

What's in my office this morning?

Today it was a Chattanooga Apartment Guide dispenser..

powered by performancing firefox

Like magic..?

If so, then don't watch this clip of Penn & Teller. But if you love to see behind the scenes, check out the cool explanation of magician's secrets.

Chad Vader

Jackson and I watched all 6 episodes of this on Saturday:

Pretty great writing and they've got over 3 million views on YouTube with probably a cheap camcorder and a Darth Vader costume.

Red Bank Cameras

The City of Red Bank took this picture of my truck:

Can you believe they want $50 for it?!? It's all blurry!

Overheard at the Willis'

"Daddy, will you come into the kitchen to see my jumping monkey?"

Cats vs. Dogs

So my theory is that, other than animal rights activists, most people either love cats or dogs, but not both, and in fact, probably think people who like the opposite pet are weird.

Cats are creepy, I'm just saying.. I still love this website.

I want that

Kind of like those Christmas lights..

U + Me = Us

Anybody remember these guys? Great stuff..

They say it's your birthday...

I'd like to thank Stephen Colbert for celebrating my birthday this Wednesday with a Guitar Hero against the Decemberists. Watch the announcement here.

Other than that I bought myself a Nikon D80, so I can be that obnoxious yuppie Dad with the ridiculously oversized camera at the zoo. Can't get a Wii anyhow, anyway.

Bikes are so underused here..

This is awesome..

N. Korea

While satirical, this article from The Onion is in no way unfactual and in fact has a certain flair of truthiness.

The Oct. 9 underground nuclear test in North Korea's Yanggang province successfully exploded the communist nation's total gross domestic product for the past four decades.

Let them eat radiation..

BTW - One of my former students from S. Korea had this to say about the tests:

"I think it's cool! They will cross the border and Korea will have the bomb, we'll be #1 super-power."

Free Hugs

This is cool, plus I'm pretty sure it's on Diamond Street in Boulder, Colorado, which is an awesome place. Can anyone confirm the location?

Photoshop Mayor Littlefield

Photoshop this picture of Mayor Littlefield with whomever you'd like:

Also, there are a lot of fun words with UT in them that can be used to conform to the new UT branding campaign. What can you come up with?

8,500 bottle rockets

This is pretty awesome:

Chrus-isms

Since Kashad, my favorite intern who is currently writing my screenplay, has dubbed my alter-ego Chrus Wullus (based roughly on Steve Carell's character on The Office), I've decided to collect a few of my off-color statements. Here's what I can remember, but please comment if you can think of any others:

1. It's not that I'm not racist..
2. What d'ya mean I'm not gay? I'm gayer than some gay people!
3. Lickert? I don't even Lickert!
4. A miata is like a ____ with wheels.

ADD

I realized something very interesting about myself for the first time tonight. I have ADD. I've joked about this in the past and my wife has accused me of ADD because of channel surfing, etc., but I finally made all the connections tonight--because of cold meds.

I've noticed during the last 3 cold and flu seasons, that while I'm on cold meds, I become a totally different person. I can focus on single activities and get tons of work done. So I've decided to look into this to see if maybe I need some brain controlling substances, because I think self-medicating with cold meds might lead to some problems.

I decided to take some surveys online, but I got sidetracked and interested in other things so I forgot about it. Just kidding.. Here are the results of one quiz:

Results of your
Attention Deficit Disorder Quiz

You appear to be suffering from a moderate amount of attention and concentration difficulties according to your responses to this self-report questionnaire. You should not take this as a diagnosis of any sort, or a recommendation for treatment. However, if would be advisable and likely beneficial for you to seek further diagnosis from a trained mental health professional soon to rule out a possible attention disorder.

So, what to do next? Anybody out there have success or horror stories dealing with their Adult ADD?

Religion

This article on The Onion website puts the mideast conflict sadly into perspective.

If only there were a religion based entirely on love..

"..a new commandment I give you, that you love one another.."
more here

Mr. T

Ryan has this on VHS or DVD if anyone wants it.

More great editing..

"..when fact is fiction and TV reality.."

Onion parenting article

Is Anyone On This Bus Interested In Disciplining My Son?

Suggestions to improve soccer..

Here are some ideas I have that I believe would make soccer a much more watchable sporting event:

1. Much bigger goals. I'm talking the entire end of the field. C'mon, 0-0! 1-2?!? I'm thinking 2 goalies, and 50 meters of open, scorable turf. And maybe make it taller too. Let's get that score up there around 45-38 or so.

2. Intermediary goals (this theory I've stolen from Jim, who in turn has taken much of my best material for jokes in our class). In football you've got downs, field goals, and safeties. Baseball has 1st, 2nd, and 3rd bases to reach before a run is scored. I suggest soccer create some intermediary goals. I have no idea what they would be.. Maybe chasing around a midget, or pulling the refs shorts down for a .25 point. I dunno, something...

3. Four periods. I like that the clock rarely stops, but seeing 80 minutes left is daunting. Let's have a couple bathroom breaks built in.

4. The US shouldn't suck. There, I said it.

More here: Indisputably, Soccer Sucks!

"Just because he invented the 60s in the 30s...

doesn't mean I have to like Frank Lloyd Wright."

Yes among the many travesties in my life, I don't care for FLW's 1970's styled rest area architecture. Yes he's influential, yes he was ahead of his time, yes I'm a bad person... But if I'd had a mullet in the 50s rather than the 80s, would I have been as big?

Now I.M. Pei...

Cheap textbooks..

they don't exist. Priding myself on cheap finds at half.com and other used book retailers, this semester I broke down and purchased a new book, very last minute, at UTC for a whopping $160. I have heard on Engineering students paying over $200 for books.

Can't help but wonder why? Do these books costs more to print? To write? To research? To some extent I can see higher costs for textbooks than say copies of the latest Danielle Steele at Wal-Mart, but c'mon..

Can't help but wonder if there is a conspiracy at foot? At least I'm not alone.

Baby names

Here are some boy baby names I suggested for a friend whose last name is Moore:

"Off-beat names you might want to not consider:

Hyphen
Six
Daeshaun
Antwone
Carlos
Portcullis

Some names rarely used anymore:
Doug
Gus
Adolph
Orville
Saddam
Darren

My top suggestion:
Michael Jackson Moore

or

Gimme."

Thanks to local TV star Jon Durnell for that last one..

Adam Sandler, not funny

Adam Sandler was on The Showbiz Show with David Spade this week. He sat in audience and the cameras cut to him on every joke--about 10,000 times. Annoying.. Especially when I have stuck up for his comedy.

A lot of people (students) I know think David Spade is just pretentious, but I think he is pretty funny.

This was good..

Good stuff

Found this site particularly patriotic and the video is friggin' sweet!
http://americawestandasone.com/awsao.html
The whole site is flash as well which is impressive.

Also fairly impressed with the metal riffs by this rockin' hate group:
Diggin' the mullets mein fuher!

Noticed they also linked to these fine young Nazi ladies:

Mary-Kate and Ashley Eichmann

Why is ignorance on this level funny to me?

Thank you former student Zach Ames for bringing me these sad links..

Celebrities that look alike

Though I've been way off in the past, I really do now think that Jennifer Lopez and Kate Hudson look different only by a slim shade of melatonin.

Watch Raising Helen then Gigli.. (if you can stand to)

Funny subtitles..

Sweet whale footage..

Get this video and more at MySpace.com

Could this be fake?

I'm stupid.

"Chris!! Chris!! You're stupid Chris and your dog is stupid!" Screamed at 9:30pm from my neighbor's back porch when Bella barked for an entire minute.

I'm stupid, but apparently my neighbor, who looks to be about 65, is 4 years old.

Google Video vs. YouTube

So I've been dropping some clips on here from Google Video and YouTube, though I want you to know, I rarely, rarely ever look at those sites because they are timekillers. However, they are pretty useful for posting student work.

Here are some clips from current and former students of mine:
Lazy Bear Productions
Anvil Fever

It seems that most people prefer to have their stuff on Google, though it seems that YouTube turns a blind eye to copyright infringement, which leads to more availability of famous clips from television.

Here is my favorite random thing from Google:

Other funny headlines..?

Any other funny headlines for this story?

"The Wrecktifier" makes its debut
Electrical engineering students design pinball machine.

Business Idea

I have an incredible idea for a business. What I'm going to do is give away thousands of iPods on the internet. No joke. I'm just giving them away. Then I will advertise that I'm giving them away by bulk emails and web banners, possibly the kind with a crosshair that says, Hit the duck and win a free iPod. Then I'll just sit back and watch the money start rolling in. Sweet!

Oh yeah, and stick it to the oil industry by not filling up your tank on Friday. Thanks.

Will there be Facebook in heaven?

I hope not.

The Office PSAs

I loved the April's Fool's PSAs from NBC's The Office this week. This was my favorite:

Office relationships: the good, the bad, and the very, very ugly.

An April Fool's message from your friends at The Office.

FEMA idiot

Anybody catch Colbert grilling Michael Brown last night? Glad I tivoed it, what an idiot. And as though his 50-year old frat-boy humor was going to win someone over. How do they get conservatives (so-called) to come on these shows..?

Is this funny?

I think this is funny, but I'm not sure. Is it?

Bunches more at www.mediocrefilms.com

ARC - Artistic Revolution in Creativity

Event at the Hunter last night was very cool. Teens organized an art show with almost every form of art imaginable represented. Two short films were shown that rocked and everybody seemed into the scene. Hats off to the Hunter Museum curators for supporting youth art.

Having all that said, I have to say, most of the kids there reminded me of this video. Maybe there's still hope for my documentary on youth subcultures which I plan to entitle: Freaks!

Please buy this:

Chris Willis
He's Mine
� 2003 2004 Chris Willis
CD Baby Price: $5.00
IN STOCK. ORDER NOW. Will ship within 24 hours!

Fogerty vs. Paxton

I'm sure I'm not the first person to say this, but doesn't Bill Paxton look just like John Fogherty?

Funny Videos

Low-brow, but very funny:
Farting preacher

This advertisement seems unethical:
Condoms

This is funny too:
Brokeback to the Future

There is also this:
Top Gun Brokeback Squadron--though Tarantino does a much funnier take on this in the film Sleep with Me.

Chaos Theory - amusing.

Not a Geek..

My wife is less than 10% geek. How sad. Maybe this is due to her being brainwashed in a sorority (just kidding!).

Well, opposites attract I guess.

Happy New Year!

Hope everyone has a happy new year! I rung in the new year at Jackson Square in the French Quarter with a bunch of very happy people. Saw a cat fight on Boubon Street, and some other stuff, but nothing too shocking or horrible out on the streets. Was worthy the LONG drive over Lake Ponchertrain to be there.

Headed back out to work today after worship, then coming home tomorrow.

Things I say..

Things I say to freak out my wife:

"I hope we're on Extreme Makeover:Home Edition some day!"

Celebrate Diversity

My truck is so coooool..

..when sporting the Tamany Oaks COC Disaster Relief magnetic sign!

Will you be in my telethon?

Anybody who's ever had a song with lyrics that reference New Orleans, please appear in my telethon..

Coming up on 200!

Coming up on my 200th post to this blog. What should I expound upon? Perhaps a retrospective on my life since blogging, how it has helped me reach a better awareness of myself..

Kitty gun not real..

Just in case you were worried, the kitty at gunpoint photo is not real.
I also found this:

Bad idea pictures..

This is actually a good idea, a much cheaper iPod.

Juggling meets A-Ha

Who needs help?

"At Chain Letters Anonymous, we understand the anxiety of breaking the chain. We want to help you overcome "forward-button addiction" and the superstitious intoxication that brings computer networks to a crawl."

Bad Momma Duck

This is mostly for my wife..

World's Worst Mother

Kerry, you are far from this,

Daddy

Intimates

Is it just me, or is buying Victoria's Secret Intimates off eBay pretty gross?

Great pic

Don't let this happen to you:

I bet it had something to do with a cell phone..

Happy whatever day

To the horror of coeds in my class at UTC, I announced that Kerry and I don't celebrate Valentine's Day. Well, guess what, we love each other 365 days a year, and I'd rather surprise Kerry out of the blue rather than observe some ridiculous Hallmark holiday.

Sites I visit often

One site I frequent quite often as of late is the Chattanooga City Court Clerk. Even though its only a block away from my office, its convenient to pay my numerous city parking tickets online, and they only charge $1.50 extra. What a racket..

Dying

I'm apparently dying a slow death from a sore throat. Day 16 and no new hope for talking again with my sweet, somewhat high reassuring voice, but only this gravely, Bea Arthur impersonation that sounds like years of smoking. For a couple weeks that was fine, but now I have a fever, aches and so does my son, so I'm apparently contagious too.

Stick a fork in me..

LOTR RISK

This is Lord of the Rings RISK:

These were the players: (I couldn't fit my pic into the mix..)

Things started out pleasant enough,

Chris and Zack whispered a lot. "Hey, maybe if we play really badly we can go home early..."

Chris was really tired..

Summer really got into the game toward the end.

Stephanie and I played it cool and allied well.

Zack A. has a zen-like approach to RISK.

Once the red armies were defeated, things turned ugly for the aptly named "Earwax brood."

Ended with a green/black victory and I think everyone, at least I think, had a good time.

Whatever happened to the Segway?

RISK

I won at RISK Sunday night.

This Thursday I hope to win at LOTR RISK.

Cosby rules!

"'Study. That's all. It's not tough. You're not picking cotton. You're not picking up the trash. You're not washing windows. You sit down. You read. You develop your brain,' Cosby pleaded at Fred D. Thompson Middle School..."

This article is awesome.

I think Cosby is a hero and champion of speaking rationally about real issues facing inner city/low income kids. Way to go...!

Article

I love this article.

No interest, no downpayment

This store has an advertisement for No interest, No downpayment, No payment at all until September 2006. Just what exactly is the deal with that? Here's a sofa, loveseat, end table and some lamps, take 'em. Then in 2 years, when they're all worn out and crappy, we'll start sending you the bill. And if you don't pay, someone will come to break your legs.

Seems funny that in a society where we have to have the best of everything we can afford, and then just a little more, that putting off payments would even be appealing. Just like leasing a fancy car. What moron pays that much a month, gets screwed at the end of the deal, then leases another car from the same company?

I guess what's funny to me is that if someone can't really afford to own something, why risk ruining your credit to have it for a little while? Couldn't you just go without for a little while, then outright buy something affordable..

I realize this is impossible in buying a home, or having a reliable car, but hey.. you know it's true.

Another thing that bothers me about the current state of things is how everything is getting more expensive when it should be getting cheaper. Particularly cellular service and broadband. Both services are nothing but gravy for the providers, but as other companies compete, everyone raises their prices. Why? Because consumers are so gullible and weak-minded to think, Gee, I really need a cellular plan that costs $70/month or broadband for $45/month that equates to $840/year or $540/year.

At least my broadband addiction is due to Comcast's monopoly on the market, which is soon going to end if EPB, Bellsouth and other companies have their way.

Finally, if my theory holds true that cell towers will soon be capable of carrying wi-fi access throughout their coverage area, we may soon live in a truly wireless age.

Election quizes and funny sites?

Anybody know of any funny quizes or election flash animations? I was looking for a good representation of sites by googling election flashanimations, but only found anti-Bush stuff. Where can I find more, including anti-Kerry and pro-thirdparty?

New Teaching Paradigm

Though I may be a little late on this, I think I've found a new teaching paradigm for Chattanooga schools--The School of Rock.

This was by far the greatest movie I've seen in the last couple of years, even with Jack Black's over-the-top acting, and I think it really says a lot about how kids learn--by doing, by playing, by wanting to have fun.

I think I will try this out with my class this Fall at UTC.

Car Rack Status

Lately I'm noticing a trend in Chattanooga that is growing exponentially. I think it has everything to do with the mayor's plan for an "Outdoor-sy Chattanooga." I'm talking about those sporty car-racks.. I mean, I feel like I'm in Boulder or Tacoma or Bend.. It's awesome!

It's really cool seeing a fancy car, such as a Mercedes or Range Rover, with a cheap mountain-bike or whatever system on top. You're rich, and you have time for leisure, Go you! It seems like the rusty old luggage carrier my Dad strapped to the roof of the car every year around Christmas just won't cut it anymore. Now you need a Thule or Rocky Mounts or Yakima--had some friends move to Yakima, desolate place.

Anyway, in my effort to look sporty, I am looking for the cheapest possible car rack that will go with my factory rack on a Ford Escape. I'm looking at these Thule strappy things, but I'm not sure they would work for a kayak AND a canoe. Would they go with my North Face and Rock/Creek stickers?

Lookin' for a good time?

If you answered yes, you may want to check out RISK--the classic Game of Global Domination. As usual, when I host the party, I am the first to be out of the game. It's just good hosting I say.






Here are some character profiles of my opponents:

This is Meghraj. He doesn't talk about strategy. Oh he talks, makes sound effects, chokes on soft drinks and plays the race card, but he does NOT talk about strategy.














Chris Young. Pessimist. Actually controlled all of Asia and kept saying, I'm screwed, I'm screwed. Keeps his cool.












Bo Wheeler. Style, aggressive. A little too aggressive maybe. Bo doesn't play and doesn't appreciate table talk. Watch your game ettiquette around this guy.












Me. All-round loser. All talk, no dazzle. Want to play conservatively but can't contain my enthusiasm. Fast start and quick finish.

Anyway. If you need more Risk you might want to check out finalconquest.com or clevermedia.com to get some action.

Take the keys away from Granny

As I happily began my drive in to work Monday morning I was shocked and amazed as an elderly woman pull out of our local Hardee's without seeing me, causing me (and my 9 month old son) to veer into the opposite lane. I kept thinking, She's gonna see me and stop, but she never even slowed down.

After incidents such as this and what happened in Santa Monica, CA last year, I am supporting a nation-wide campaign to remove old people who can no longer drive safely from the roadways. I'm talking letters to state senators, a public service announcement, catchy slogans, a jingle... Let's all come together on this important issue. DWO - Driving while old...

Red Bank, TN

Here are some things that I think are funny/strange/stupid about Red Bank.

1. The name. I've yet to find any meaning behind it. I'm not sure if we actually border the river, but I doubt the bank is particularly red.
2. The city government. They took away recycling pickup because it was too expensive, yet my trash pickup fees went up. Now I have piles of cardboard and moldy milk jugs piled up in my basement and have to drive it downtown myself.
3. The police. They are always zipping around at 80 MPH on our 35 MPH streets. It sets a bad example. I'll see 4 cars flying into a neighborhood and think, Surely this will be on the news. It never is... and I'm so worried its just a case of DWB (Driving While Black.)
4. Accoutrements. What's up with those street lights every five feet? The old-timey looking ones..? How do they enhance the strip-mall, power-line rigged, downtown intersection of Morrison Springs and Dayton Blvd? My suggestions, no more crippety-crap, waste of $$. Invest in underground power supplies.
Why is Dayton Blvd in Red Bank anyway?
5. Apartments. At least 2/3 of Chattanooga'a apartment housing must be in Red Bank. How did this happen? Was there a meeting? Maybe this was decided at the same time when they decided not to integrate Chattanooga's public schools.

I guess that's it. Anything I've overlooked?

Car air conditioners

I am disappointed by the limited options available in any car I have ever owned or sat in related to air conditioning. In my Ford truck it's either air on face, max air on face, or air to defrost the window (you never pupt outside air on the window to defrost, which is a common misconception), or air/heat on the window and feet. You can have vent on face, feet, or both. You cannot have air on feet and face, ever.

Our Escape has pretty similar limitations. Our Honda was the same. About the only nice option I've ever seen in car a/c is the swing feature on a Mazda 626. I just think they could come up with more alternatives for the cars in my price range. Do higher-end cars have more AC options?

iTunes is cool

I just completed my first legal download and music purchase off of the internet with iTunes for Windows.

I always thought these songs were G. Love or Ben Harper. How many groovy hippie songwriters are there?

Apple makes such sweet software, and $9.99 for an album with 16 songs, say Hello to doing the right thing. I personally don't think Napster 2 will come close to competing with iTunes, but Wal-mart's entry into digital music may undercut everyone's prices starting an all-out competition with fair market and everything.

You thinks Lars Ulrich will be really happy people are paying $.50 for "Enter Sandman?"

Hippie Food

HELP!!! I'm addicted to hippie food! Why do I love tofu sandwiches? They really have flavor, or at least, they absorb the flavor around them. Hummus on flatbread.. What am I, Greek? Snooty pizza places like Pisa Pizza make my mouth water...

Is there something wrong with me? It's not like I'm wearing ripped blue jeans and birkenstocks.

Does this belong to you?

This showed up at my back door the other night, surprisingly, the day after I discovered this site (UTC professors were protesting it, hee-hee!) I have a sneaking suspicion Bill Colrus dropped it off. The kitty promptly took over the dog's house and annoying to Bella, knows no fear. I really hate cats, but this kitten is really really cute. Anybody know a good place to take it? I'd hate to stick him in a old jar and put him on the shelf..

Isabel Downgraded to Tropical Storm

Ahh, we were all pulling for ya, but hang in there, you may cause some destruction yet.

This picture needs a headline:
"8 Newscasters Die Heroically So We Can Watch"

Suggestions?

Bowling for Columbine

I found the first half of Bowling for Columbine to be brilliant and inspired. I'll even let slide his exaggeration on the numbers. But from that awful cartoon on to the end it just fell apart.

His style is unique and in your face, and he does makes a compelling argument that Americans are basically stupid, homocidal, and bought and sold by groups like the NRA, Lockheed Martin, and Republicans.

Star Wars Kid

This is pretty funny.

More info at www.jedimaster.net.

Let them eat my ridiculous new movie!

So Arnold Schwarzenegger's campaign seems to be based on the idea that since he's rich, he doesn't need to take money from special interest groups, thus he's the best man for the job. I think thats a fabulous idea. Because really, who is going to be more for the people than the rich? Particulary an Austrian-born Hollywood actor. Of course there have been bad examples, like Marie Antoinette--also Austrian, but hey, you really think you want some poor guy off the street in office?

I thought of this first in the last mayoral election in Chattanooga, where there were about 10 crazy, underprivileged, lower-income candidates, running against Corker, an extremely wealthy businessman and land developer. As I much as I dislike excessive welth and the trapping thereof, I then decided that it is better for the rich to be in politics than poor. Of course honesty is the key, but who isn't going to take an opportunity to better himself, with all the construction projects that need to be doled out.

Of course now my theory has been debunked, by the likes of Martha Stewart and Mayor Corker, and having to drive to Douglas Street to get to work, or do a Dukes of Hazard, Yee-Haw when jumping the hill now constructed on Georgia Ave. near Vets bridge.

Oh yeah, I hated everything but the last 8 minutes of T3.

Infectious

Click here to watch the debut of Meghraj Hazare & SBP Productions' Infectious.

Funny Headline

Adorable Democratic Candidate Actually Believes He Has A Chance

MTV's "The State"

Here's a good article if you liked MTV's "The State."

Sitcoms

Funny how when you never watch a sitcom, but the two times you see it, it's the same episode.. Or maybe thy're all just so terrible?