verbingnouns

Thing You Should Know About July

My brother brought me Tuesday's Arkansas Democrat Gazette, which features all of the different things we should be celebrating in the month of July. I've been told that I'll use any excuse to have a party (I have hosted an Unbirthday Party and I've attended both Groundhog Day celebrations and a Witangi Day Party), but even I was not aware that I could be celebrating all month. You know, they call the end of November through January 1 "The Holidays", but after you see this list, I think you'll agree that July is much more fun:

These are a few things we should be celebrating all month:
Anti-Bordom Month
National Bison Month
National Blueberries Month
National Hotdog Month
National Culinary Arts Month
National Cell Phone Courtesy Month
National Foreign Language Month
Air Conditionaing Appreciation Days

Of course, tommorrow is Independence Day and Saturday is my dad's bithday, but the real fun begins on Monday with the beginning of National Nude Recreation Week (sorry, no links). Interestingly, National Nude Recreation Week coincides with National Laundry Workers Week (maybe they have the week off?).

The 10th is Don't Step On a Bee Day
July 12th, we celebrate Cow Appreciation Day, which is nice because July is also National Baked Bean Month, and what goes better with baked beans than a nice juicy burger?
The 13th is Gruntled Workers Day (federal employees do not get this day off)
July 14th is National Town Crier's Day
July 16th is Michael Flatley's 45th birthday ("His legs move about as if independent from his body!")
July 20th, please be aware...it's Shark Awareness Day.
The 21st is a day I think we can all celebrate (unless you're a lactard): National Ice Cream Day.
The 24th is National Cousins Day...I know I'll be partying for this one, celebrating all the cousins I have but never see.
The 25th is the beginning of National Salad Week...which makes me wonder how the 28th got to be National Drive-Thru Day. Maybe we should have a McSalad.

What a fun-filled month. It's a good thing I have a vacation later this month, because all this partying is going to wear me out.