a very uncomfortable place

i gave up hope

Anything but love...

Ah, the inevitable squirrel nut zippers. ^_^ i'm making dinner tonight. it being the friday after thanksgiving, matt must work until 11 tonight. 12-11, that is almost like my days at work! jonathan found little bowser a home finially. serendipity misses her already. my dog is such a puss too. speaking of, my sweet little tard kitty gizmo is gone. it makes me so sad ;_; and i wish i had never taken him back to my parents house. either a coyote got him or a dog did. either way he's gone. whatever got him got my aunt's cat too. i don't know about penny's cat (i feel for the cat anyway for being part of that family). i made two types of cornbread tonight. buttermilk and mexican style. i'm starving! wondering if chris is at work. i'm sure he is. oh, i read a friend's journal and found out there is a movie being made: the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy. i can't wait. though this is not what i expected marvin to look like. my friend paula was the one who got me into it though she never knew. of course robert parker had a hand in it too. well, i am now going to go play the sims. i may make a strange character and see what kind of diabolical things i can do ^_^ thanks to chris and that website he goes to for the idea of course. thanksgiving with the hatcher family was awesome! okay, i'm outtie.

the greatness of charlie chaplin

i am watching the kid written and directed by charlie chaplin.

it's very good, i think chaplin is a genius. *and that kid grows up to become uncle fester in the original series!* i also bought tillie's punctured romance.

i am very happy with my purchase. i also bought two buster keaton movies, though their names just aren't coming to me right now. :(
i just adore johnny depp as sam in benny and joon! he imitated both buster keaton and charlie chaplin in it.

today wasn't a bad day really. we had to put down jo jo hightower though, that was extremely sad and we were all crying. he's been in renal failure for several weeks now, but he seemed like he was doing okay for a while. it is just so sad when an animal you've known for a while and are attached to gets ill like that. and then being the one to have to put him to sleep, oh it's awful. but that's life, and we may cry every time, it will never get any easier, but that's part of the job. i think i will continue with my movie and maybe order a pizza. wish i had some company.

simka died in surgery

i was shocked when i heard that. simka was so happy, though in pain, and seemd quite healthy. she just had a fractured leg, and i've been though many fracture repairs with dr. bearden, both as anesthetist and as the assistant. sure, we've had some close calls. it's just extremely upsetting to hear. i heard that dr. mabe had a breakdown yesterday when she had to euthanize an animal right after simka died. that truely disturbs me. dr. mabe seems very cool and laid back to me. man, in my one and a half years at shallowford animal hospital i've never been through the kind of week we just went through. it's crazy! and today we have discovered that will and larena are dating. which makes me extremely happy for the both of them because they are so cute together! but i had to advise keeping it on the dl because they being coworkers may cause problems at work. i mean it may be against policy. also i am scared that larena may end up hurt because will is leaving for nashville next month. hell, it may just be a fling. so i have felt a lot better today. though hearing all the bad news about yesterday, i had a fairly good day. oh gosh steamboat has the BEST sandwiches! *sigh* i have a test in psychology tomorrow. i should probably read a tiny bit more. i think i shall do that now.

one step closer to the light

okay, i feel so much better considering i've had time to calm down. i have studied quite a bit of my psychology, though it will never help me to figureout myself. i'm listening to some cheeky music. and i must say that belly dancer's nightcap is one of my favorite sites to read. she posts such wonderful pictures and she's just so beautiful! that gives me faith in people. though noone will understand that, i don't care. i have been looking about lately. am i who i want to be? have i been someone else lately? is that why i am unstable right now? dots do not even please me anymore! ay me, i need to open my eyes so much wider. pictures to come later of my sweet serendipity. i realize i haven't put much of an effort into keeping this site updated as i really should have all this time.

how utterly slow

i am sitting in this dark house alone.
i had a nice lunch with chris and matt today. and then looking at all the religion books with chris was fun too, listening to him call this author and that author a douche was entirely aumusing. and insightful. and it has left me in thought...
religon...i've been pretty much agnostic for a while now. i went to church at river of life for a long time. i've been baptised. i studied wicca when i was younger, gave it up for that travesty of a human being travis. chris and i were looking at the new age books today. i was becoming interested again. but i want to study a lot of things now. wicca is a new thing. i studied it, now i'd like to look at others. i find catholicism interesting. i find witchcraft interesting. i am very conflicting aren't i? *sigh* oh what am i saying? do i really have the time for that kind of thing? i believe i am too lazy to really put my heart into anything lately. yes, i find something is wrong with me. matt's worried out of his mind over it.

oh forget it.

i get into these moods where i look at what i've wrote and i just want to throw it all away. i need to say something though. i can't just always post pictures and be this mindless little person with no opinions on anything. i need a fucking life.

i want the Ultimate hitchhikers guide to the galaxy. i saw it today. but i also want dark tower VI and VII. *sigh* i want everything i can't have. i want to see some old school dark shadows. also doctor who. my mom's got a lot of doctor who tapes hidden in that house somewhere...by god i'll find them! mom wants to hear the hhgttg episodes that i have. she has this marvin the paranoid android song that she loves and she's never actually known the source. you know, i really need to study. this isn't for me to just blah blah into. don't understand why i am. maybe because i'm sick of doing it on livejournal, yet...alas i do it here as well. not too bright is she folks?