This latest development with Anna's brother, Delane, I think has become the last straw for me. I. Am. Angry. These are not feast day meditations. But they are what they are.
I am Psalm 77:8-9 angry. "Has His mercy ceased forever? Has His promise failed forevermore? Has God forgotten to be gracious? Has He in anger shut up His tender mercies?" I am Job 7:11 angry. "Therefore I will not restrain my mouth; I will speak in the anguish of my spirit; I will complain in the bitterness of my soul." I am pointing the accusing finger. I want answers. I want results. I want Delane healed and whole. I want his children to have a father who will give his daughter away in marriage, who will give his fatherly advice to sons who act like they don't want to hear but secretly long for it. I want him to bounce grandchildren on his knees.
This three years of suffering is a manifest evil. It is wrong. I have a just complaint. Where are these miracles that others testify of? Where is this healing we are promised? I want God to act. I want death and corruption to be put to death. Do we not sing about this every Divine Liturgy? Are these just words?
Where is the power of God? I want an answer. Why does he not act? How much suffering must a man endure before God brings healing? How many of Delane's loved ones must have their faith stretched to the breaking point? Does God want to destroy faith? This endless cycle of hope and disappointment is just a hellish injustice. How much can one take?
Posted by Clifton at September 14, 2004 11:14 AM | TrackBackPraying also.
Posted by: RL at September 14, 2004 09:28 PMPraying also. Your pain and anger are so evident. Offering both to God is right, I think.
Healing comes in many forms. May God bless you all
I don't know. It sucks, that's all. I'll pray.
Now I know why you're reading Holy the Firm - started at the top and worked backwards. She'll help you by not helping you.
Posted by: Thomas at September 18, 2004 01:24 AM