Canada isn’t a bad place, mind you. They have beautiful scenery, lots of snow, hockey, decent beer, back bacon, Bryan Adams, a great relationship with Cuba and a nifty oath where new citizens get to swear allegiance to the Queen of England. Canadians also don’t have to worry about tax cuts, annoying religious expression or that pesky First Amendment. But therein lies the rub: Canada is not exactly a free country. Because it is against Canadian law for preachers, writers, broadcasters or publishers to broadcast, print or say anything that “might” promote hatred or contempt for any identifiable group, concerned Canadians cannot speak out about vital public and moral issues—many of the same issues that Bush dodgers have been speaking out about here in America.

When our comrades in transit find out that Canada is not all it’s cracked up to be, they’ll need an operation to fix their broken hearts. And they’ll have to come back to America to get it. After all, it takes an average of 25 months before they can even become a permanent Canadian resident and then, and only then, do they get to stand in line some more—like every other Canadian—for that great healthcare we’re always hearing so much about.

These folks want to leave a country where they think they have no say concerning government affairs in order to go to a country where they really have no say concerning government affairs?

Well, in the immortal words of Bob and Doug McKenzie, “Take off, eh…"