January 04, 2005

i dont know.

I always wondered why "Walking Contradition" was my favourite song by Green Day
Now I feel like I'm living it.
I guess I know myself better than I thought.

I don't understand how I can be so thankful to be myself, and for everything that I have,
but wish I was someone different.


I don't understand why I can continue on with something even though I know its not good for me.
And I don't know why I keep wanting it, even after the decision has been made that I deserved better than what I was dealt.


I don't understand why I keep assuming the best out of people.
What part in me creates this need, this drive to believe that everything is a possibility? Its too dark to consider the opposite, I know this and will never give into such thought... but I assume that sleep is the closest I'll get to escape.

Unless my dreams become a confontation as well.

I hate and love the things that make me up.
Maybe its because I know nothing else, and also that I believe I am working at making myself the best I can be...

I can't be anything other than what I am meant to be... but also I can be anything I want to be!

I believe that if any assumptions are to be made, they should be the best ones.
But its always been human nature to do otherwise.

Posted by BLiNK at January 4, 2005 05:44 PM | TrackBack