August 27, 2003
Baby Inventions
Wouldn't baby monitors be more effective if they provided two-way communication? So I could be sleeping, working, or just being in another room and hear the baby crying, cut in and say, Hey boy, cut that out. Why should I get up and go in there?
J/k. I do believe in getting a lot of face-time with the baby. However, there are a few inventions I'd like to see to make life easier. The first would be a automatic diaper-changing machine. If Eli Whitney could invent a cotton gin in 1792, I'm pretty sure 211 years later we should be able to do something here. Also, how bout a baby washer styled after those nifty golf ball washers. Swish, swish, swish, and he's fresh as a daisy.
Any suggestions for useful baby inventions? I say useful, because here's a list of useless ones available at Target or Walmart:
Wipe warmers - takes all the fun out of slapping a cold wet rag on his butt
Electric or Microwave bottle sterilizers - guess what, you can do the same thing with a cooking pot
Boppy - some people love em, Kerry just sits on it
One-way baby monitors
Here are some products that I really like:
Diaper Champ - keeps poopy smell isolated and uses kitchen-sized garbage bags. I just want to see an X-Large version for families with octuplets.
Snugli - the only way a father can lay around and do whatever he wants while claiming to be watching the baby
Oh yeah, I want to invent Mom a way to drink while nursing without dribbling all over. I guess she could just use a beer hat or a Platypus backpack.