Wittenberg Door

Today

I am going in the next few weeks to get a Mac for school. I have never used a Mac before (except doing a little pagination at our local newspaper) I am not familiar with Mac OS at all. I am excited about learning the new machine though. I have heard a lot of good things.

Today was a good day - a day of mixed emotions. Sometimes I wonder if I really hear God correctly or if I just imagine His guidance and leading. I have been involved with a church plant of house churches - a network to reach the indigenous population cultures of the US. The US is truly a mission field (Newbigin) and I feel called of God to be a missionary.

But it is such discouraging work. Weekly I feel like quitting. I tread on. I have no idea why - except that I have been called. I feel like Abraham - " GO "

"Where God?' says Bran
"Just go - out there - make disciples."
"But people don't like me - I am demanding and rough around the edges" replies Bran sheepishly.

"Go"

So here I am - in a small town that I grew up in - with no "culture." That really stinks because I want to be apart of the "cutting edge" of the "postmodern church revolution" and wah wah ad nauseum. I think entirely too much of myself.

Then I remember. I remember one summer night when I first moved back to Vicks. I was on the tallest hill in the city, a place called Fort Hill which overlooks the Mississippi River, and I cried out to God

"Give me this town for you Lord, or I die" ( I really dug John Knox.)

I had no idea that my novel sentimentality would actually mean something to God. But He has had me here since. I cannot leave until I see God pour out His Spirit here - I have tried.

So I guess as I reflect now I see - I remember why I fight on. May God pour His grace upon me. I need it.

Posted by bran at August 13, 2003 10:51 PM | TrackBack