A Peck of Gold

There But For the Grace Of God

I had a "moment" a few days ago. You know the kind- where you suddenly realize something big? I'll explain.

I was strongly affected, like many of you I'm sure, by the Russian terrorist act at the school. I especially thought of the parents sending off their children for the first day of school, and to have something so horrible happen, and never see them alive again. I thought about it for days, how terrible it must be for them, and how frightened the children had to have been. Then, Sunday as I was reading the paper, I looked through the obituaries. There was a picture of the cutest little toddler boy, died at the age of two. I thought of his poor mother, how she must have been feeling at that exact moment, coping with the loss of something so sweet. How does it feel to have your heart ripped out? Then, on the way home that night, I was listening to Delilah and a young woman called in to dedicate a song to her brother, who was adopted when she and her siblings were in fostercare. She has no idea where he is. Her mother died, she and her sisters were split up, and she's had a very hard life.

I was bowed under. It seemed liked everywhere I looked that day was heartache and tragedy, and I was grieved. All these people were suffering something so big and I was lost in the pain of it for them.

It hit me then. God, how He's protected me from those things. How He's spared me and blessed me, and how ungrateful I am for that sometimes. I get caught up in what I don't have, or how "hard" things are, and the truth is, I don't even have a CLUE about how hard life can be. I have my health, I have my children, I have a family who's not perfect, but I know my brothers and sisters are safe and thriving. I whine about the little pinpricks in life, and I was ashamed at that moment.

I prayed for these people who have been dealing with the unimaginable, the unthinkable, and then, I praised God for His blessings to me. Not that I think He's cursed these other people, that's not what I'm saying. And I don't think that being a Christian is any kind of guarantee against bad things. But I realize, just how merciful and kind God has been in my life, for whatever reasons, and how I daily take His continued grace for granted. I was humbled, and thankful.

Next time I think of complaining about my little problems, I'm going to remember that.

Thanks for sticking to the end, by the way. I know that wasn't the cheeriest post I've ever written, but APOG is all about keeping it real. And sometimes, the real stuff isn't easy.