It's Tuesday. How about some bar jokes? Add 'em if you got 'em!
A jumper cable walks into a bar.
The barman says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."
Two peanuts walked into a bar, and one was a-salted.
A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron. "For you?" replies the bartender, "no charge".
A dyslexic guy walks into a bra...
A sandwich walks into a bar.
The barman says, "Sorry, we don't serve food in here."
A priest, a rabbi, and a Baptist preacher walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"
A font walks into a bar.
The bartenders says: "Hey, we don't serve your type in here!"
A mushroom walks into a bar.
The bartender says: "Hey, you look like a fun guy!"
Two cartons of yogurt walk into a bar. The bartender, a tub of cottage cheese, says to them, "We don't serve your kind in here." One of the yogurt cartons says back to him, "Why not? We're cultured individuals."
Oh, it's good to be corny.
A 3 legged dog walks into a bar and announces
"I am looking for the man who shot my pa."
A termite walks into a bar and asks
"Hey is the bar-tender here?"
A polar bear walks into the bar and orders a gin....... and tonic. The bartender says "Ok, but why the long pause?" The polar bear says "These? I have had them all my life"
A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says
"Hey pal, why the long face?"
Oh those are so great....and short so I can use them at a party! Perfect!
Posted by: ashley at November 18, 2003 01:22 PM3 guys walked into a bar...you'd think one of them would've seen it.
A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender looks up and says, "Hey! We've got a drink named after you!" And the grasshopper says, "Really? Who would name a drink 'Bob'?"
Posted by: Micah at November 18, 2003 02:53 PMA string walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, "We don't serve strings in here"
The string goes back out and ties himself up and frays his ends. He then walks back into the bar and asks for a drink.
The bartender says, "Hey, aren't you that string that was just in here?"
The string says, "No, I'm a frayed knot".