January 09, 2006

Your Own Historical Jesus

[Note: In honor of the really, really bad TV show "The Book of Daniel" that premiered Friday, I was prompted to pull out of the archives this little humorous piece I wrote from the inspiration from AKMA's historical Jesus class.]

(With apologies to Depeche Mode)

Historical Jesus

Refrain:
Your own historical Jesus
No one to hear your prayers
No one who cares
Your own historical Jesus
No one to hear your prayers
No one is there

Jewish unknown?
Jesus Seminar clone?
Flesh and bone?
Is Schweitzer alone?
Is Crossan a deceiver?
Funk'll make you a believer

Gnostic Thomas is best
Put Q to the test
Mark's second best
Nothing to confess
Jesus won't deliver
You know he's no forgiver

Reach out and vote pink
Reach out and vote pink

Your own historical Jesus...

Jewish unknown?
Jesus Seminar clone?
Flesh and bone?
Is Schweitzer alone?
Is Crossan a deceiver?
Funk'll make you a believer

Jesus won't deliver
You know he's no forgiver

Reach out and vote pink

Your own historical Jesus

Reach out and vote pink

Posted by Clifton at January 9, 2006 09:17 AM | TrackBack
Comments

Oh man--given how much heat I took from the alpha males at All Saints for my professed love of Depeche Mode, they should all be directed to this! Clearly only a top shelf fan of Dave Gahan's crooning and heroin O.D.'s could ever produce a farce this fine.

Man, I'm going to have this stuck in my head all day...

Posted by: Gabriel Sanchez at October 5, 2005 12:57 PM

Why, thanks!

Er, I think . . .

(Oh, and by the way, I neither affirm nor deny ever having owned the album "Violator" or ever having listened to it incessantly.)

Posted by: Clifton D. Healy at October 5, 2005 01:00 PM

OUCH ! that hurt. My ears!LOL!
So we should admire the syntax and ignore the slaughter. I'm going to cry as soon as I stop laughing.

Posted by: glen at January 9, 2006 11:28 AM

Clifton, you could post that monthly and I'd still love it.

Posted by: Doug at January 9, 2006 05:04 PM

http://www.blogs4god.com/node/1105

Posted by: papa herman at January 11, 2006 05:36 PM
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